Red Responds: Brace for Change

Susan from Duluth asks:

Red, I just got a divorce after fifteen months of separation without any explanation from my ex-husband about why he left our twenty-three year marriage. I spoke to a psychic on three different occasions who told me that my husband and I would get back together this fall. She said he would not stay with the woman he had an affair with and who he’s been with since the separation. He has now moved to another state with the girlfriend. We have an eighteen year old son with autism and a developmental disability. Not only am I still trying to get over the pain of his dad leaving me, but it’s even more difficult to cope with my son’s reaction to his dad moving away.

How can someone who you lived with and loved for twenty-three years have changed into such a selfish, dishonest coward? Why did that psychic tell me, with such certainty, that we’re going to get back together? It was such a disservice to give me the hope that we would get back together. What is your sense about my situation? Thank you for listening, and I would really appreciate any advice you can give me.

Psychic Red ext. 9226 Responds:

Dear Susan,

I’m very sorry that things did not evolve the way they were predicted. The psychic wasn’t trying to give you false hope or mislead you. Unfortunately, there are times when things change, or timelines change, particularly in the realm of relationships. Not everything can be seen, predicted, or foretold with complete precision, because predictions are made based on the information visible or obtained at that moment in time. Any variable or anomaly has the potential to create a chain reaction – which can either bring things together as predicted or cause disruption. Free will is often the number one source of any type of shift, but sometimes an outside variable can pop up, affecting a chain of events. While that may offer you little solace (because your husband has yet to come back to you), hopefully, it will help you to understand that you weren’t being played. We psychics tend to have a very high ethical code, and hate to be wrong. Most of the time, we feel absolutely horrible when we’re wrong; I know I certainly do. Most of us strive to be as accurate as humanly possible, because we’re consciously aware that our predictions impact lives – and that’s not a small responsibility.

Looking back at your readings, there really wasn’t any indication that your ex was going to move forward with the girlfriend. At the time of your readings, particularly the second one, the relationship between your ex and his girlfriend was internally in such a state of upheaval that it’s a bit surprising that they managed to work through their issues enough to be together at this time. His free will stubbornness and her free will desire to keep him created an element of harmony that really couldn’t have been foreseen. That’s not an excuse or justification, it’s just a relay of the information my guides are giving me.

Your ex didn’t all of a sudden turn into some selfish coward; he more or less broke under the stress of life. His affair, move, and personality shift – these are all attached to him looking at his life and mortality; essentially resulting in a stereotypical mid-life crisis. He felt trapped by the responsibility of you, your son, routine, and the frustrations of responsibility. His girlfriend made him feel virile and young, and he saw a chance for greater happiness, so he took it.

Susan, brace yourself. Your ex is going to marry this woman next year. Even though the marriage doesn’t look as if it will last, and it does look as if he will try and reunite with you after this marriage fails, there is a whole lot of time and upheaval between now and then. This looming marriage is going to be incredibly hard on both you and your son. You’re going to feel betrayed all over again, and your son is going to have a very hard time trying to cope with it all. As much anger, pain, abandonment, and resentment that you feel, your son feels it all just as much, if not more deeply than you. You will have to continue to be strong for him, and it would help him to adjust if you could hide your anger and pain. It’s not going to be easy for either of you, but if your son sees you seemingly being strong and okay, it does help relieve some of his pain, confusion, and sense of abandonment.

I know you’re hurt and angry; and you have every right to be. I’m sorry for just pouring more fuel onto the fire, but I have a duty and obligation to serve you to the best of my ability, even if the news isn’t good. The best advice I can give you is to encourage you to continue to try and heal from all of this, and move forward in your life as if your husband was never coming back. When he does come back into your world (and he will try), by letting go of him and the pain he has caused you now, you will be able to choose whether or not there is a place for him with you and your son, based on the man he presents himself to be at that time. Your ex did what he wanted to do in search of happiness, and now it’s time for you to do the same. You can have love and stability in your life again, but it doesn’t necessarily have to be with him.

Brightest Blessings,

Red

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2 thoughts on “Red Responds: Brace for Change

  1. misskrystal

    Being in this field, professionally, since ’92, I must say that Red explains the fundementals & dynamics in psychic readings the best! Thank you, Red. I wish you the best, Susan, and your son. My grandmother is from Duluth. She is 101 still with me-I hear all about the stories of Duluth.
    I found this piece all so interesting.
    Huggies to you all,
    Miss Krystal

    Reply
  2. gr8tfull

    Susan. Your story is all too familiar and your pain is/was mine. 23 yrs of marriage and I was blindsided when he said he wanted a divorce and left for another woman. The psychics also told me he would come back and they would not last. But almost 2 yrs later they are still together. I now understand the “timing” thing. And the change that is Free Will. I can’t tell you it gets better overnight, but I can tell you it does get better. Not knowing your spiritual beliefs, I can tell you that a dear friend told me early on that “Rejection is God’s protection”. Not getting what we want, can truly be the biggest blessing of all. I had to learn to appreciate me and my freedom. I have the love of my children and grandchildren, that my ex threw away. He will not have the tender moments I have. His choice will cost him more than he ever imagined. It does get better when you realize YOU are finally in control of your each and everyday ~ and if and when, he does come back, you will not have a need for someone like that in your life. Hang in and enjoy your son and the joy he brings to you and your heart. You have each other. Hugs for the holidays. You can do this. We must!

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