Many of you are in love with someone who is not available to you. You dream of them, you think about them constantly, and you couldn’t care less about dating anyone else. You are told time and again what you know in your heart. You feel karmically involved (like soulmated cosmic lovers) and have spent at least one lifetime together. But for some reason, you can’t seem to connect in this life, but you yearn to be together. In this manifestation in this life, you have already spent too much time in constant heartbreak over being alone, without this love in your life. You say to me, “But I’ve tried, Yemaya. I’ve tried so hard to let him go.”
I know you have. I know how difficult it is to move past an unresolved love affair. I also have witnessed this pain time and again, and I believe that I have seen a “soul-lose-shun”:
Resign yourself to the notion that you’re not going to get what you want
Give up if your rational mind is telling you it’s hopeless.
Give up if your friends and loved ones say, “reclaim your life.”
Give up if you have called any on of my sisters or brothers on the CP line, and they’ve said, “I see no future connection. I don’t see this person in your life for certain.” After you’ve exhausted all avenues, save your own life and find happiness again. Seems daunting? Almost scary? Here’s how to move forward:
Step 1, SOUL: Make up your mind and acknowledge it to friends and loved ones, or your friends here online. Make a firm commitment to yourself that you are more important. Then mentally see yourself pulling away from their energy. Meditate on your souls letting go of each other. Visualize it. Do it as often as you can. Repeat it once or twice daily. It’s more effective this way.
Step 2, LOSE: Rummage through your home and “lose” the items that remind you of that connection. Clear the space for new love. Take their phone number out of your phone and delete them from your Facebook/Twitter/MySpace pages. If you want your life back, you have to let go of the fantasy that YOU are attached to.
Step 3, SHUN: When your mind wanders and you start to think about them — or talk about them — stop! Take a deep breath, wiggle your toes and fingers, and pull yourself back into the now — in your body, in this moment. What’s the next action you need to take? What’s right in front of you? Ok, shun all thoughts of that old relationship, any memories (until you are over your addiction to it), and shift your mind to another topic. Move on to something immediate which requires your attention — something in the now. If nothing is pressing, go find something to do.
Try this moment-by-moment. When you really apply yourself to these steps, you’ll feel stronger and able to move forward with your life. I know you will not be able to do this until you commit to it. There’s a saying I’ve I adopted, “When you are sick and tired of being sick and tired, you will stop.” I know it’s hard, but I’ve seen many people succeed. They go on to experience a healthy love with whom to share their lives.
Or you can continue to sit at home — alone. It’s your choice. Good luck, and my prayers are with you.