Nightmares of Exes Past

Ever have a nightmare about an ex? We all have…but I’ve been noticing lately that a few of my friends still have nightmares about someone they haven’t been involved with in a while. They always feel that this phase should be over. Whether it’s been a couple of months or a couple of years, depending on the nature of your relationship and breakup, it’s possible to have nightmares years after — even when you’re happily moved on with someone else. Many of us still have childhood dreams, whether pleasant or not, so it’s not crazy to imagine that an adult relationship with someone could haunt your nights. In talking to my friends and dealing with this myself, I’ve realized a few things.

If you’re dreaming about an ex, it doesn’t mean you still want them or miss the relationship. If anything, it means you were greatly impacted in this relationship or breakup and you are still processing some of the damage.

It’s okay. It doesn’t mean you’re getting over it too slowly or that there is something wrong with you. I know when the initial breakup happens, many of us have a hard time just functioning in our day-to-day lives. When the pain of a breakup hits, it can knock you down for a little bit…but that’s okay. Because soon enough, you will bounce back and resume your life. So sometimes having those nightmares is just your mind and body’s way or processing and healing when you have time. When you do have these nightmares, talk it out with a friend or psychic dream analyst. Just analyzing the dream may help you realize what is eating at you and how to move on from it. And let’s face it, learning what went wrong is how we figure out how to go in a different direction next time.

What many of us don’t expect is to find ourselves in love with someone new and still having nightmares about an ex. Don’t let it scare you, think of it as healing. Remind yourself, “It was a nightmare and you are now okay”, whether alone or in a new relationship. Sometimes, we just don’t have enough time in our days to get all the work done so instead of being scared by another nightmare, thank your body for helping you purge the bad energy.

46 thoughts on “Nightmares of Exes Past

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  4. Jenna

    I have been dating this amazing guy for 5 months now and we just are on the same page about everything and we have talked about our past and what has happened and how our past relationships ended. Well my situation is a little different in high school I was raped by my boyfriend and physical abuse…well I thought I left all those horrible memories in the past but I was WRONG!

    Lately I have been having really bad nightmares about my ex and what happened in high school…in most of my dreams he is raping me over and over again and no one hears me screaming and can’t help me and everytime my boyfriend shows up to help me I wake up. Another dream I had was my ex boyfriend beating me up and all these people see it happening but no one can stop him because there is some kind of force field up and I am screaming and I wake up screaming in my room after each dream. Now my dreams have been taken to the next level every time I fall I asleep I am so aware of my ex being in my dream that each time I start to dream I am looking for him and running to stay away from him and its weird how I know everytime when he will show up. Last night I had a dream that I called my boyfriend to come help me and get rid of this ex but my boyfriend didn’t show up in time to save me from my ex and I was beaten badly.
    What is going on with me, I am over my ex I don’t see or talk to him at all, he hasn’t been apart of my life for several years, but for some reason he is popping up in my dreams. I love my current boyfriend and we have talked about our future and he understands my dreams and doesn’t hold anything against he just wants me to figure this out and get help!!

    Reply
  5. nrusingh ojha

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    Reply
  6. Marie-T

    Hi Paul, we have a lot of psychics who are good with dreams. You can try psychic Ariel at ext 9775. And Nola I just opened a fortune cookie today that said “A part of us remains wherever we have been.” I think that’s true and why we often dream of people who are no longer present in our day to day. Maybe you could also try talking to Ariel or any of our psychics that are good with dreams. Wishing you both the best.

    Reply
  7. art

    So interesting- lately, I’ve had nightmares of exes. Exes with other women!! In any case, its been making me think about her.

    Reply
  8. nola princess

    its kinda funny this artical came about, I haven’t been sleeping well and have been thinking much of a some what past love, I have a new love and I decided not to call my old love any more in order to move on with my life, cold turkey so to speak, but that relationship took me to so many places I dont have the strength dwell on, but yet we both ended up loving each other but at the same time we are at differnt stages of our lives. Its been a few months and im dreaming about him. how do I stop the dreams?

    Reply
  9. PAUL NOWAK

    What if u experience a total opposite. Like having apprx 30 dreams of that one person in 4yrs. What does one make of that. Some are confusing, warm, joyful, and heart felt. AND when that person replies to u in such a dream after u asked them a question. How do u deciper that in the physical realm once you awake from such dreams. I wish I could speak to someone about them who knows dreams? Sigh! P.N.

    Reply
  10. Marie-T

    Hi Susie, I’d recommend lavender oil or a lavender eye pillow. If this happens often and you want to get some decent rest, try some herbal tea before bed too. And I know for me, talking to friends or writing about it helps get it out and so maybe I’ll dream less about it. I know it’s hard:( but it will get better. And when you do have those dreams, just remind yourself it is just a dream and he is not there to ruin your day so don’t let him! Take care:)

    Reply
  11. Susie

    I read your article and i am glad i am not the only one. The only thing that bothers me is the actual nightmare. If my body is purging itself, I wish it wouldnt give me reminders. I wake up in a bad mood if I have these dreams, the less I dream about “him” the better I feel.

    Reply
  12. Marie-T

    Hi Everyone, I’m so touched and moved by everyone’s comments. When I wrote this, I was in what I thought was a loving relationship and now I find myself literally “dumped” and ignored. It is painful to say the least and reading all your comments, I understand your pain. There is no quick fix, whether you have nightmares or are not sure in which direction to go we all need to heal. Certainly I do recommend psychic readings. Spend time with friends and people you know care about you. Do something nice for yourself every day. Cook a good meal, exercise, meditate, pray. Though you don’t know it now, it won’t always be this way, it really won’t. We will all feel better. And whether or not you end up with this person who hurt you or someone new, you need to be okay on your own and happy on your own. (believe me I know it’s not easy to hear, I’m right there with you!) We all deserve to be treated with love and respect. Life is not always fair or easy to understand but one thing is for sure and that is that change does happen so keep working towards a positive change and it will come. And definitely reach out and call the psychics here at California Psychics. They are caring and kind and can help you move through your ordeals. You’re all in my thoughts:)

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  13. Kristen

    The person I’ve been dreaming about lately is someone with whom a “traditional” nor “normal” relationship took place with. I met her thru my sister one yr after graduating high school; my sis, 1 yr younger than myself, was still in high school, and I’d be the one to drive her to and from school, as well as all around the city and to and from her friends homes and whatnot. Between her friend and I, the “relationship” was very mutual, though my sister put on an incredibly eerie possessive front for her friend, a possessiveness that, even though it’s been 12 yrs since the whole situation began, still stands strong, although she and this one friend in particular are no longer friends, nor do I, nor have I had any contact w/this person for several yrs now.

    My sister’s friend and I ended up becoming majorly enamored with one another within a span of 3 mos –but what transpired over the following 8 yrs or so after the beginning was sheer hell, all lit a-glow by my OWN sister! I had fallen in love with her friend, just as her friend had with me, but my sister, with whom I had, up until the point of falling for her friend, shared an inseparable bond and friendship. Instead of my sister, whom, at the time I considered my best friend, being happy for me having found my first love, she treated me as if I had raped her friend and then burned down her family’s home for Christ’s sake! And my sister has held this grudge looming over my head for the entirety of these past 12-yrs since I had to give up my first love bcuz my sister was making her (her friend’s) life HELL at their high school!

    My sister and I have not been close in a really long time. She has deceived me time and time again, and has told each and every single new person she has met in these past 12 yrs how I had stolen her friend away over a decade ago, and how it broke HER heart!!! She gets all these different people throughout the yrs to believe I am a horrible sister, an insensitive monster who ruined her friendship with this one girl, when all I did was fall in love, and it truly, sincerely IS just that simple and THAT innocent! I NEVER rubbed it into my sister’s face, even afterward!

    The girl I fell for, after the initial 3 mos, ended up going along w/what my sister had been saying –my sister would call me a liar and tell me that what I had with her friend was never anything special, and all sorts of mean things, and then she’d try to get me to tell her things, intimate details, in order for her to tell me just what special meant in regard to my relationship w/this girl she had befriended. The girl eventually pushed me away, there was never ANY positivity except for when she and I were alone and everyone else was outside, and I don’t blame her of course, I can see she was just a 17 yr old girl experiencing something that’s already taboo, but to also have her close friends picking on her while in the public school system –i didn’t have that problem since i’d graduated the yr previous, but it STILL hurts! It hurts like mad, twelve years later… though I barely started dreaming about her again just this past Fall 2009. Ever since then, I have thought about her frequently –and the dreams I have of her, they’re more like happy things, happy dreams rather than nightmares –but I believe I am VERY scarred inside because, though I understand now, and have understood for several years now, that she was 17 yrs old and experiencing something that was already considered taboo, BACK THEN I didn’t quite understand all that –my thinking back then was that she was abandoning me, she was leaving me and lying about she and I, and our relationship as if it never took place, even nights after being intimate –but I felt I was sacrificing then and that he wasn’t, I felt she was taking the easy route out and instead of fighting for me and what we had, back then all I could feel was grave loneliness, and for years afterward it haunted me.

    She would come back into my life from time to time, but only to cause me more confusion, because even though she definitely did end up becoming a lesbian, she’d always toy with me –almost like she was stuck in that place my sister had put her with me –never being able to wholly enjoy something positive and happy with me because my sister might find out.

    What does it mean, my dreaming of her all of a sudden, and thinking of her day to day now, 12 yrs later, though her memory never really left me?

    Reply
  14. kristen

    Lois ~ paranormal experts believe, when you just thought you saw something out of the corner of your eye, you really did! Also, scent is not only the strongest sense tied to memory, but is also one of the ways loved ones let us know they are around us.

    Reply
  15. Kristen

    I read in a dream interpretations book once upon a time, that when we remember our dreams, whatever the dream works itself out as, thru dream interpretations, is really something in our waking lives that is still affecting us, still bothering us; when we do NOT remember our dreams, that means something that was once a bother, an issue of sorts in our waking lives, has been lifted from our subconscious and is no longer an issue for us.

    Reply
  16. alexa robles

    hi everyone,
    my name is alexa and i was in a relationship for almost 3years.in those three years i had some wonderful and unforgetable moments.i was engaged with that person,and i lost my virginity with him because i really though that he was the one.but sadly it had to come to an end.i found out that my ex was dating 3months after we broke up.and now its been 1year and 4months that we broke up and now im finding out that his friend had part of our break up.all of the girls that my ex had dated are friends with his friend.and he was trying to make me date some of his friends.but i dont know if i should tell him because i no my ex and i dont think that he has forgot everything that happend between us.what should i do,should i tell him r not?even tho he dosent talk to me.
    i have also been dreamig with him,that we are friends and sometimes we make out and date again.i dont know what to do,should i try and win his love again r should i let it go!!!plz,give me ur opinion i really need it,because i think that i still love him.

    Reply
  17. alexa robles

    you no norma im not sure but i have the same problem i keep on dreaming with my ex!!if you get any information plz let me no.

    Reply
  18. Lisa

    I don’t have nightmares, I have dreams that we get back together. Like, a lot. I’ll have a dream that we run into each other or that he purposely comes and finds me so that we can patch things up. That’s the hardest thing, because I’ll wake up and realize that it was just a dream… awful.

    Reply
  19. jason

    Hi
    I know the pain and difficulty in moving on. I too have been divorced and eventually moved on to a new marriage, but at times suffer flashback.

    Regards

    Reply
  20. Cee Jay

    Dear Giusi,
    Thank-you for your insight… I too had a soul-mate who lived with me for 12+ years and though our split-up was very rough, I still miss him alot. In September of 2008, he passed away suddenly, and despite our parting-of-ways over 4 years ago, I have been devastated at this loss. I feel that I’ll never meet anyone who can compare with him. Yes, I know I SHOULD take each person as an individual- with strengths and weaknesses all their own, but how can I NOT compare?! Tom didn’t always treat me right, but I couldn’t have loved him more- It’s hard to accept that I can’t see him or ever give him a hug…. sometimes I imagine that he is sleeping next to me in bed at night because the thought comforts me… Any suggestions?

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  21. lbc40f

    Luis……….I understand because I too had no closure with my first love during my youth…we never resolved the issue of will we be together or is this just a secret fling…so it could be quilt, hurt, or questions that need answers I am glad I am not the only one experiencing this……..I am not alone and you are not alone….you may want to see him to get closure but it may not mean you will desire him the same way if you see him today because so many years pass. Write him a letter like I did even if his wife gets pissed off at least you will get it off your chest the quilt….or write the letter and light a pink candle of love and burn the letter and give it to the universe that you did care about him and that you are sorry…and maybe your dreams will go away……….lbc40f…read my story below…..

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  22. lbc40f

    Yes in my opinion I believe we sent that signal radio wave per our minds and they too are dreaming or thinking about us…..but I am not a psychic but we all have abilities to think and receive feeling of someone thinking about us. For example: Have you had someone that called you or you called them and someone said, “Oh, I was just thinking about you. ” It happens all the time but are they thinking about calling you or getting in touch not necessarily. So I believe but in my case my dreams of my ex came about right after my mom died.

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  23. Angeleyez

    I agree with you 100% I’m battling myself with getting a divorce. I’ve been separated for over 4 yrs now and I’m in the process of finally getting a divorce, it’s not easy after being with the same man for over 13 yrs but you have to finish the book and keep it close forsay.

    Reply
  24. Fiffy

    Hey lois…
    Your article really inspire me…i had a bf when i was 17,and i broke up with him when i moved to the city..i actually dumped him bcoz for me,its not gonna work with the long distance relationship…
    And now,its been four years ago,and i actually had been in and out few relationships,but what makes me wondering is that i still have nightmares about my long lost love story,or to b correct,ex bf back in hometown..sometimes,i felt so affected with those nightmares and i feel lost,missing him badly…i realized that no one will ever loved me like him used to love me before.
    As an initiative,i tried to contact him and unsurprizingly,he ignpred me since i had dumped him years ago,..i have been single for almost two years ago,and i cant deny my inner desire to b with him again,to fix what went wrong in our relationship.
    What should i do,,sometimes i think this might b something to do with the guilty feelings for dumping him and he is still mad at me.i need some advice from others.i cant bear to sleep and continuing having nightmares about him and makes me wonder about us all day…tq;)

    Reply
  25. Norma

    Hello Ladies,
    I dream about my ex alot latey. Does that mean that he also dreams about me or thinks about me at the same time?

    Reply
  26. lynnecarter6

    Speaking of relationship breakups, how to you get over a marriage of 41 years when you have been with your husband for the whole of your adult life. I wish I knew how to move on as I am finding it almost impossible even though I know how badly I have been treated. How do you turn off the light switch?

    Reply
  27. LBC40F

    Hello: My mother died 12 weeks ago and now I am dreaming about my first love of my life. I had the urge to contact everyone from my youth to let them know they were loved. I lost the only person in my life that loved me unconditionly, my mother. So now I am dreaming of my childhood and the love of my life. I also, wanted to know if the love of my life every felt the way I did at one time. I been trying to shake this off by talking to old friends from my pass, but the one in question wants nothing to do with me so I heard. Well, his current wife is very jealous. I just feel that he impacted my life and to see him one time in person may help my grieving process. I want to know that he is okay and give him a hug and let him know that he was a major playing in my life. He was the one male person I could talk to about anything, however our relationship was dyfunctional. We were extremely young and I believe he took advantage of the fact that he knew that I loved him. I had feelings for him from the time I was 13 to 19 and then I had to leave the big city to go to college. I never had closure and now mom is gone and my dreams of my youth are haunting me. I can not sleep because I do not want to dream and I have no desire to eat. I am thinking he is the key for me getting through my mom’s death. But I do not know why he would be the key to this lost. Besides the fact that I was so emotionally distraught from the secret relationship that I decided to go off to college far far away from home and I missed having a life around my mother as a young adult. HELP????

    Reply
  28. Michelle

    I rarely ever dream and don’t understand why. Once a therapist told me she would like to talk to me about it. She believed she knew why and was going to tell me. Unfortunately, that session never transpired and I have wondered since what she was going to tell me. She knew I lived a long abusive relationship thru my late teens and twenties with whom has been…as I see it at the age of 42 now…the love of my life. I had his three boys and we have now been divorced for 8 yrs. Does anyone know why a person doesn’t dream?

    Reply
  29. jim

    I also had a dream that her and her other friends she made when I was gone run over my dog that I am really close to that really maad her mad I think that is what put the nail in it she said she did not deserve to be treated like that but I did not meen to be mean do yall think she hats me because I told her about the dreams I reall need help on this.

    Reply
  30. Keli'i

    I disagree with your statement. Emotion is never logical. Furthermore, love is not an obligation. Once you define it as an obligation and are unable to fulfill someone’s expectations, you will fail. Whatever degree you have I suggest you go back to the real school of hard knocks. There you will find correct answers that is right for you. The point is, is this, the Answers are within self. When self is in control of self, all things are in balance around you.

    Reply
  31. Giusi

    Dear Lois
    I had similar experience because the men that I loved an lived with for 10 years passed away in 2001
    Even do I moved to US and we was not together at the moment he passed for me was devastating
    I dreamed about him for years.
    When there is a deep connection with somebody that connection will never end
    But you need to understand that you will never forget about him because that person is part of how you are today but you need to let him go and rest in peace if you think that you can let him go only if you find a new love that is not fare for him
    He need to be happy where ever he is and let him know that you love him and everything is going to be fine with you
    At that point you will continue to dream about him but only wonderful dream and he may send you some guidance throughout the dreams
    At some point when you live at peace with your self you will find New Love
    And remember Do not compare, let the new love be a new experience and a new you
    You never know how many wonderful thing life have in storage for YOU
    Blessings
    Giusi Mastro

    Reply
  32. Keli'i

    Move on with your Life. when things are good everyone is happy. When things get rough, things go bad. Love should be unconditional but it is not. That is the reality. Like winning a bunch of money and before you know it, you have all these friends and ex’s that show up. Wow! Now you are famous. But, when the money is gone, who’s standing besides you? Sad, isn’t it?

    Forgive the Past and move on with your life. More importantly, Forgive unconditionally and in doing this, you will heal.

    Reply
  33. Lois

    My dreams have been intense lately and they are of my fiance who passed away in January of 08 in our apartment home I still live in. I usually end up waking with great sorry to find hi return was just a dream and I feel so lost still without him. I have dated and even had a relationship since his death but the true depth of love I had with him was the first time I truely felt loved by a man not related to me, in my now 45 years. Even now on occasion I can smell his cologne in the apartment and catch a form from the corner of my vision as I sit at the computer desk we shared. I know he has not left me, and I sometimes feel that he won’t until I can find a love close to what he gave me.

    Reply
  34. felicity

    It is so easy to place weight on dreams we have of our “past relationships” ( I also read recently, referring to them as “my X” meant we were not over the relationship either).So when we want someone back in our lives, it is comforting and reassuring when we dream about that person only to feel deflated when the dreams cease.Maria’s article makes sense–the dreams are a purging, not necessarily some cosmic connection we may want. Finding clarity through a Reading has to be the key and should I find myself in this painful place again, I would do so. Keep up the good work ladies.

    Reply
  35. xxxxx

    dear all
    kindly give me your perspective on my story, i have never knew love until i was dumped by fatme, i met her in the university, spent marvelous times with, we were together 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, if not together on the phone, we were perfect, i loved her and she seemed to adore me i met her parents.
    then i lost some money my family was a little on the edje so i worked double shift, i couldnt see her as before i only slept 4 hours a day, she didnt stop naging me and i wasnt in my best situation, the fights began, she dumped me around 18 times and came back.
    the last time she dumped me i went angry on her and after 3 days she met another guy and a month later she got engaged, still now my wound is not healing although a its been a while.
    i dream of her eveynight when i see her my heart could of jumping out of my chest, she loves her new man and dont want me back but i cant forget her, i even dont want other girls.what should i do i want to let her go i want to forget her but i think she have possessed me plz help me

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  36. Veronica

    Forgot to say, when I hooked up with someone else, he took the first ever chance to get info from a good friend of mine, asking three times, only stopping when she told him she’ll never give an answer and he should ask me if he wants to know.

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  37. Veronica

    Hi,

    I would appreciate some advice on the situation I’m in.
    Last fall I got involved with someone I always looked up to, working together. I knew he broke up with a girlfriend of four years, someone he even moved away from his home country for, and they broke up half year later so he got stuck here were I live.
    He was the one starting it but a few days later he had a meeting with his ex and then told me he still has feelings for her. I was supportive – after all he was a friend – and said he has to look after himself etc. He got worse and worse, and two weeks later he got into a fight and then broke down crying so I stood at his place so he won’t be alone. Then my granny passed and he was one of the friends who was with me that day and asked me to go to his place and talked to me all night long. But we never really talked in between these, or when we did, it was about his troubles, on the phone. I tried to be supportive and helpful, and be there for him as a friend but I am sure he realized at some point that I’m in love with him.
    He traveled home and when he came back he stopped talking or contacting. On the day of traveling he removed all “public relations” on you know, facebook, picture tags etc.
    I was with him once after he came back, he came out with us on my birthday party but he said “he cannot be with me, close to me and not having anything but he cannot be in a relationship.” I know that this would mean he doesn’t want to be with me. He also said we (his close friends) try to look after him but we don’t see he has to deal with things by himself. His best friend once accidentally told me I ask my people too many times how they are when they have problems.

    The thing is, I’m still in love. I see him almost every day, he hooked up with girls I know, all of those three failed in weeks and I had to watch the whole thing happening all three times – the third was at work, with a friend who even started gossiping about me after he hooked up with her, and couple weeks later he seemingly dumped her, they don’t even talk now (well no one knows but every friend predicts they are done). He didn’t talk to me sometimes even didn’t say “hi” and I don’t know why or what I did.

    Two weeks ago I have learned he’s in a bad situation and I jumped in to help without him knowing… hours after he got me into trouble at work. I didn’t think about the aftermath of asking a favor from my boss for him, and his best friend, a good friend of mine too, tried to help me and talking me out of this, why I did it, what I expected etc. I had to tell him what I did (my boss wanted to talk with him) but otherwise I would’ve kept it to myself and that friend.
    I did not expect him to fall on his knees and say he loves me because I think he does not – even though my friends say he loves me, he does the stupid teenager things boys do when they admire someone. Last week he didn’t talk to me, this week he was opern, helpful, smiling, first time in three months I could talk to him (I talked only about work tho) and he was very supportive. He even said he’ll do some extra work to help me out. But when others are around, he still acts like I’m not there. And I feel he is keeping boundaries, keeping it on a work-only level.

    I just need some advice, some outside opinion, how to get over with this. I love this man and want to stop it, if he does not love me, then it’s wasting my time and feelings. Or if you agree with my friends who say, I need to wait until he’ll be okay with everything again and ready for something, and then he’ll come forward, then say that. I just miss the caring person he was and want to believe the things he said at the start he meant as well, also cannot understand if he didn’t care for me why did he look after me when my granny passed…

    Thanks a lot!!!!!

    Reply
  38. Mark

    Abigail, thank you! I know love is an emotion, and the one I prefer to feel. When Cheryl said she believed emotions are not an important part of us, I knew I was in trouble! I wanted to talk to her about her fears but she thought I was criticising. I wish I had controlled myself better! I do love that woman!
    Thank you again!
    Mark

    Reply
  39. Mark

    Gina Rose, thank you so much! I have you already on my wish list to talk to, based on past blogs of yours. When my financial difficulties are better I would very much like to talk to you. I AM sorry for the long blog! Please forgive me! It is very difficult for me to feel so much and not be able to talk about it. Cheryl said I have a gold aura.
    Mark

    Reply
  40. Abigail Ext 9570

    Hello Mark,
    Hello Mark,
    “LOVE IS AN EMOTION EXPRESSED THROUGH ACTION” -S.J.Alexander
    Here is the problem not all people act on their emotions which makes it only a thought or fantasy
    She is in her head fighting with feelings. Empathic means you pick up on others feelings she is incongruent.Her conscious not in tune with sub-conscious
    I hope this helps.
    Many Blessings
    ~Abigail~

    Reply
  41. Abigail Ext 9570

    Hello Marie,
    You are very creative, dream alot keep it up you’ll manifest this year! What Marie is describing in this article is called venting dreams(letting go) the mind is releasing the stuff that no longet belongs there.
    Many Blessings
    ~Abigail~

    Reply
  42. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    Hi Mark,
    This is alot to respond to over a blog…..
    I would love to ” read ” you as this sounds like a strong Karmic tie…..rather than just a regular nightmare. My Guides feel that this is NOT over.
    Blessed Be )O(….Gina Rose ext.9500

    Reply
  43. Mark

    Hello, ladies! I would appreciate your perspective.
    Last August, a few days after my birthday, Cheryl broke up with me. I had problems understanding her sometimes, and assuming things. However, I felt she was my soulmate because of the other 90 to 95% and I loved her very much, and still do. I needed her to love me back enough to be patient with me. I told her she made me want to be a better man. Unfortunately, I have only loved two women and both times my heart has felt enormous and it was (and is) difficult to let go. I love very deeply. Yes, I have issues from an abusive childhood, and unfortunately, Cheryl does too. She also has it much worse coming from abusive relationships, and she say she is an empath. I am an emotional man and Cheryl says she does not believe emotions are an important part of us, (is that possible in an empath?) which scared me. I have been working very hard to find and let go of my past hurts and emotional blocks, because I don’t want to hurt anyone emotionally, or lose someone dear, like Cheryl, ever again.
    Here is the rub; she is a Cancer, and also I believe, afraid of strong emotions. From her past hurts. I would never have hurt her or her children, never. But several times (like our argument about emotions) she felt my upset and called it anger and I feel she became afraid of me. She walked away a week or two after telling me that if she believed in soulmates, she thought I might be hers. Oh, she also took her ex on a camping trip with her that weekend and dancing later that same week, both times without telling me first. We live in different states. I talked to her on the phone that morning when she was getting ready to go camping, but she didn’t tell me he was there. I believe her about how her intentions were to be kind to him in his hurt and to keep him in her childrens’ lives. I just don’t know why she wouldn’t tell me before taking him to these places, only after. My friends believe I am naive at best in believing her, but I believe in her, isn’t that what love is about? I still feel her sometimes, we had a connection that would wake us up and get us on the computer to each other in the wee hours. I still feel she misses me, or thinks of me anyway, but she won’t talk to me. Why do I dream of Oregon still when I know I shouldn’t move anywhere near her? I have dreamed of Oregon for a couple of years before meeting her, of course, or knowing she lived there. And most importantly, how can I get rid of these deep feelings I have for her? Time? It just doesn’t feel right walking away from this love I feel when it is so rare. Sometimes I feel her and sometimes it feels she won’t ever be back. Which is true? I know I should move on, but if dreams can be psychic, what do I believe? I sometimes wonder if I am a bad man, but I don’t think so. I am definitely confused. I am sorry, the reason I question her empathy is because I don’t know how an empath could do things with an ex without talking to her current bf about it first. Was she fallen out of love even then? But she sent me a beautiful birthday gift and told me she loved me several times after these things. Am I blind? What of the dreams?

    Reply
  44. Miss Krystal ext. 9192

    I read this article and after I went to sleep, I had a dream about my old sweetheart from 22 years ago. Oddly enough, early this morning, my window was open, and I heard a man outside that had the same eastern accent, tone and mannerism in his voice-as the old bf. lol
    No, I don’t miss him. But he did impact my life at one time. So I agree with Gina Rose.
    Just wanted to share-
    thanks and I liked the article a lot.
    Miss Krystal

    Reply
  45. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    Hi Marie T,
    I agree totally……these nightmares do not always mean that you are, missing them,wanting them, or getting back with an X.
    *****(Psyhic prophetic type dreams differ from straight up mightmares).*****
    Having dealt with domestic violence victims, referred to me by Psychiatrists and Therapists….it is as you said that ….it is usually an indication of how much that person impacted your life.
    Sort of like mild cases of post traumatic stress….depending on the level of hurt and residue one sustained mentally, emotionally,financially even,… and/or physically.
    Very intelligent article!
    Blessed Be )O(
    Gina Rose ext.9500

    Reply

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