She Loved You Once Before
I get a lot of calls from people who want a second chance with a partner who has left the relationship, and you may be surprised to know that a lot of these callers are men. But, it’s not just about getting their partner back. It’s about getting them back, making them happy, and keeping then happy so that they don’t leave again.
First and foremost, it’s my job to find out why the relationship didn’t work. I use Chinese astrology to understand the nature of the people in the relationship. I can also use this information to tell what phase each person is in—are they done with this chapter (this relationship) in their lives; is the couple on two different pages, in two different books; or will they get back together? I know I am a bit old-fashioned, talking about books in a Kindle world, but you get what I mean.
Some men can be clueless when it comes to getting an ex back. On Mother’s Day a guy called me to ask if he should get his ex flowers on Mother’s Day. Well, she clearly wasn’t his mother, or anyone else’s mother, so I told him it was very inappropriate. There are holidays where buying an ex a gift to win them back would be appropriate (think Christmas), but Mother’s Day isn’t one of them. Also, it’s better to give gifts on a non-holiday, because if it isn’t well-received, you could ruin her holiday and yours.
Winning a person back takes time, money and tenacity. You don’t want to come off as creepy or too desperate. Here are some tips:
1. Keep in touch with your ex regularly. Send a text, email, or call them and ask them how they are doing, but make it casual. Don’t profess your undying love.
2. Know why you broke up and admit to your part in it.
3. Remember that if this relationship can’t be fixed, you are going to have to have a Plan B (which may involve getting over the relationship and moving on).
4. If the problem is not yours, be empathetic.
5. Go out of your way to be nice.
6. Sending her flowers or a gift is a nice idea, but it has to be meaningful to her. “I’m sorry” flowers and gifts are pretty common. If you want to win her back, you need to put more thought into the apology gift.
7. Recreate those romantic feelings you once had for each other with a song, story, movie or an incredible date. Recreate that vibration you once shared with her.
8. Go back to the beginning of the relationship and remind her why you feel in love in the first place.
9. Call a psychic. We have insight into your relationship and can share more specific tips that could bring her back.
Sometimes, the best thing to do is to just let that person go. As much as you want her, you need to be open to the possibility that after all the effort you’ve made to win her back, she still may not want to be with you again. It’s so hard for me to tell a caller this, because they are so focused on making whatever changes are necessary to win their ex back. But when the truth of the matter is that there is nothing they can do to win their ex back, the best thing to do is to heal, move on, and focus on getting a new relationship that will stand the test of time.