We had a very wise comment roll into our Why Married Women Don’t Leave post that I thought would be valuable food-for-thought! We would love to hear your feedback on this argument …
Obviously this is just my opinion, however it is the opinion of a woman who has lived seeing both sides of this unfortunate behavior. The bottom line is, I think be it a man or woman there is obviously an emptiness, a void if you will, that leaves that individual needful. Be it lack of physical contact or emotional, it is human nature to seek to find and fill those voids. As sad as it may seem, many of us have never been taught in our lives to find self fulfillment … therefore we continue to look for it in others.
I don’t believe there is ever an excuse for having an affair … if you feel your partner needs to change ask yourself what it is within yourself that can not accept that individual for whom they are. Another thing we as individuals never want to do is look at ourselves to see if it’s possible part of the problem lies within. Aren’t we told to accept people for who they are? Don’t misunderstand me, I don’t condole verbal or physical abuse of any kind. That should never be tolerated, however from experience it does not justify an affair either.
Maybe it’s time we all take a step back and simply ask ourselves that one old question when confronted with this opportunity (if that is what you want to call it). How would I feel if the person I love or whom I’m involved with did this to me? For those who have been in those shoes, did it make you feel more empowered by displaying the same behavior? Did it improve your situation? My experience is no, not in the least. I thought my world was already turned upside down, yet I had no idea what upside down could really be until engaging in an affair.