You know them when you meet them – or at least after you’ve been around them for a while. These classic crazy-makers are enough to drive anyone to drink, or eat, or do whatever it is that we tend to do in order to cope with their insanity. But from now on, instead of letting some one’s else’s crazy drive you absolutely nuts, try these tactics for dialing down the destruction and getting on with your life – with or without them around!
The Control Freak
Whether they’re your boss, your co-worker, your friend or your partner, these overbearing, always-over-your shoulder types have a way of making even the most capable feel like children. And while honesty is usually the best policy (you know, asking them to back off and trust you to do your thing), control freaks will rarely see your side of the story – even when they say they do. So, rather than suffer under their constant condescension and scrutiny, try this: Do things your own way but give them credit as your inspiration. By giving them a perceived say in your methodology (the illusion of control), you may find yourself able to work around their insanity.
The Know It All
Cousin of the control freak, the Know It All has an answer for everything. No matter what the area in question, they feel they have some level of expertise to chime in with, and half the time, it seems like their only objective is to contradict you! Unfortunately, no one is going to change their mind about their superiority – even if it’s rooted in feelings of inferiority – so rather than try and do battle, simply tell them you’ll have to agree to disagree or nod, smile and walk away. Take heart in the fact that they don’t know any better, because arguing with these stubborn folk will just drive you even crazier!
The Constant Crisis
Nothing ever goes right for these frazzled messes – it seems like everything is always in upheaval. If it’s not their work, it’s their love life or the betrayal of a friend or family member. The catch is, these walking hurricanes are actually the ones doing the destroying – they just don’t see it that way. You can try pointing out the commonalities in their constant complaints, but odds are, they’re not going to take advice from you. Instead, they’ll turn you into their latest calamity. In this case, the only thing you can do is distance yourself… otherwise, prepare to be drawn into the destruction.
Nothing you do is ever good enough for these needy types. Sure, they’re always willing to be there for you – often going above and beyond the call of duty – but make no mistake, it’s not for free. Co-dependents have no boundaries and expect you to be the same way. As soon as you let them down (and you will), they’ll freak out, angry that once again, someone fell short of their (ridiculously high) expectations. The best way to deal with a dependent natured individual is to draw careful boundaries of what you can give – and what you take. It may make them wary, but you’re probably better off anyway!
Whether it’s romantic infidelity or cheating on their taxes, these are the people who are always looking for a short cut – and they’re willing to short change anyone but themselves to come out on top. Feel free to call them out on their creepiness to see if things change (sometimes, this can put them on their best behavior), but don’t think you’re going to be the exception if shiftiness is their rule. You may stay on the safe side for a while, but eventually, the corner they cut will be yours, and you’ll be left with the sneaking suspicion that you knew this would happen all along – because deep down, you did!
What are your “favorite” crazy-makers?