With so much time and money devoted to being physically attractive, it’s easy to forget that being attractive is about so much more than looks. Here are our four favorite ways to draw other people to you – without setting foot in a beauty salon.
Being a good listener isn’t just about being there when a friend needs to vent – it’s also about paying attention to what people are saying in everyday life. When you meet someone new, don’t just pretend to listen while you think of something impressive to say once it’s “your turn” to talk. Send a message that you’re listening through eye contact, nodding and follow-up questions. By engaging yourself, you’ll turn a dual monologue into a real conversation. Listening to people makes them feel interesting and attractive – feelings that they’ll quickly begin to associate with you.
In the monotony of daily life, we end up filling conversations with discussions about the weather and who got voted off American Idol the night before. But there are also those folks who always have something interesting to say. The guy who heard about the coolest new gadget. The girl who just read the most fascinating book. Those are the people we are drawn to – people who can offer us something unique.
So instead of sitting on the couch watching that Friends re-run you’ve already seen a thousand times, get up and go learn something! And don’t just “cram” on current events so you’ll seem smart to other people. Instead, learn about the things you’re actually curious about. Read the biography of your favorite historical figure. Take a class in cooking, painting or how to ride a motorcycle. Not only will you make yourself happier, you’ll also become more knowledgeable and passionate about the world around you – creating an intriguing, exciting aura that will draw people to you.
Of course the most interesting people are those who actually live interesting lives. You don’t have to become someone you’re not but you may have to put a little more effort into being who you say you are. If you like music, don’t settle for downloading songs on the Internet. Go to concerts, check out new local acts or take guitar lessons. If sports are your game, join a local team or sign up to coach a little league team. The key is to become a more active participant in your own life.
People who lead full lives are happier and more confident – and it shows. Having a broad range of interests makes you more exciting and appealing. Plus, you’ll end up meeting a wider variety of people with whom you have things in common.
Some of the most magnetic people on earth are those who genuinely love others. They live selflessly and always try to see the good in everyone. They lead ordinary lives but never cease to do extraordinary things. These are the people who constantly seem to draw other people to them.
You don’t have to be Mother Teresa to become a more loving person – you just have to make a conscious decision to approach life with a loving attitude. After you make the decision, you’ll be surprised how quickly you’ll find opportunities to be loving. Give someone the benefit of the doubt in the next office spat. Offer to help an elderly person struggling with groceries. Do an enormous favor without expecting to be repaid.
By taking the focus off of yourself, you’ll begin to assume a warmer, more giving nature that will make other people want to be around you. And even better, you just might find yourself drawn to whole new world of unique and interesting people.
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