Sandra in Davenport, Florida writes:
For about 15 years now, I have been dreaming about my ‘puppy love,’ a boy I liked in school, but was too shy to even say hello to in the mornings when I saw him. I know for a fact that he liked me, but my sister, who is three years older than me, liked him too, and they soon started dating. For me, that was the end of the story.
In the dreams, sometimes he ignores me, and I suffer like a little girl. Other times I dream we are about to have sex, but there’s always something in the way, like an open window or people that show up in the room. The act is never consummated, and I always feel frustrated and upset when I wake up. In my dreams, I’m always looking for his approval, but rarely seem to get it. Sometimes he will even make fun of me.
He always seems a little lost in my dreams — like he’s in a hurry — and sometimes he even delivers messages that I forget. While I’m dreaming, I always feel like I love him … I’m 30-years-old and a happily married woman. I no longer have feeling for my once-upon-a-hundred-years-ago crush, so why do I keep dreaming about this man? I even feel guilty about having these dreams.
I send you love. Thank you for figuring this out for me.
Well, apparently that’s not the end of the story. There certainly seems to be some unfinished business concerning this boy, or the circumstances surrounding your crush on him. Usually when we have dreams about people from our past, there’s something going on in the present that reminds us of that person or situation. In your case, is there something you started that feels incomplete, or something you desire that seems out of reach? This could be a tangible object/goal, or a feeling, like the need for the approval of others.
Or perhaps you feel that someone will take what’s rightfully yours, whatever that may be. The boy could even be apart of you, the part that feels inadequate and lost, but which is also critical of you. Also, if you have some unresolved feelings about your sister stealing your puppy love, which is essentially what she did — maybe it’s time to talk to her about it. Whatever the unfinished business is, the dreams will most likely disappear when you resolve the feelings attached to it.