Read Between The Lines

Key tips for Internet dating

 

While just a few years ago, using the Internet as a personals service still carried stigma in many circles, online dating has quickly become one of the most popular and convenient ways to meet that special someone. But the very things that make surfing the singles scene via your computer so simple, are the same things that demand you be careful.

The anonymity of the Internet requires cautious honesty, discretion and a little reading between the lines before you can really be sure about the potential partner you're getting to know. That's not to say that all people online are liars who exaggerate their incomes and post old pictures. In fact, mounting evidence points to the opposite!

Most studies say the majority of online daters are honest (even if they're only sharing their best attributes). But don't rest so easy just yet - there are indeed some weirdos out there in cyberspace. The good news is that if you read the signs (and their profile) carefully, you can usually avoid getting involved with liars, cheaters, fakes and imposters in general.

3 red flags
When assessing your cyber date, look out for the following signs: 

1. Their communication reads like a form letter 
2. A guy repeatedly brings up a face to face meeting but is unwilling to share contact information
3. They tell outrageous stories that don't seem to add up

The devil is in the details
Underneath that great job, killer face, arms of steel or perfect figure, you may notice someone who mentions past relationships a lot, or speaks in the negative ("you won't be a..." or "don't enjoy..."). When someone writes what they don't want rather than what they do, it indicates they are motivated by negative experience and very possibly still reeling from a recent relationship (hence, they're already comparing you to their ex just by asking that you not be like them).

Meeting up
Conversely, when someone is overly enthusiastic (they want to meet you after one email exchange or start mentioning the way things should/will be "if you are the one"), it can indicate desperation, relationship hopping or both. If they pressure you to meet before you're comfortable with the idea (and they know it), then it signals danger and you should stay away!

I'd like to get to know you...
While it may sound great to have someone chasing you, any self-respecting person should want a suitor to know who they are first and foremost. Likewise, when it comes to online dating, never underestimate the power of your imagination! Rather than falling in love with a fantasy you've created in your mind and attached a person's picture or profile, you should take the time to be sure you actually know who's on the other end of the Internet connection before convincing yourself you've found the one.

Keep your fantasies in check by knowing the facts. Don't spill your soul secrets unless the other person has earned it and even then, be honest and open but informed. There's never any harm in taking your time.