“It’s all about you and what you need,” said my friend Val to me one day when we were chilling out at a local cafe. I couldn’t look her in the eyes. Instead, I sat staring at my chai tea. If I truly admitted it, I’ve always had problems putting myself first. I love to please other people<\/a><\/strong> and thought I was pleasing myself in the process.<\/p>\n Now, I had two relationships that were draining me. One was a friend who was suffering from severe depression. I had been there for her when she had stopped eating and drinking, causing us to take another trip to the emergency room. She called at all hours\u00a0desperate to talk for hours on end (although I had to be up early for work, I still took her calls). Another was a boyfriend. I cared for him, but he wasn’t really acting like a supporting character in my life. Instead, life was all about him and his accomplishments. I just got tossed into the fold and felt used<\/a><\/strong>.<\/p>\n \r\n