We all think we control our lives\u2026 or do we? More and more it seems many of us allow our day to day to be dictated by something other than our own desires. Responsibilities are real, sure – and we all have them, but taking care of your responsibilities while taking care of yourself is a very far cry from letting outside forces dictate your world’s order. <\/p>\n<\/p>\n
The former is creating your own reality while the latter is living by someone else’s rules. Admittedly, sometimes, it’s hard to tell the difference!<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
So, if you’re not sure who’s got the reigns in your life, here’s your chance to find out. This quick, score-it-yourself quiz will give you an idea of where you stand when it comes to setting your own agenda\u2026 and if necessary, how to change it!<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
1. Quick reaction (in other words, don’t spend time on this one, go with your gut), my daily life centers around:<\/em><\/p>\n<\/p>\n a. Getting through my work (career) 2. Before I make plans for a vacation, I’m most likely to consider:<\/em><\/p>\n<\/p>\n a. How long I’ll be away from work and if there’s a wireless connection 3. It’s dinner time. You’ve had a long day. Your major concern is:<\/em><\/p>\n<\/p>\n a. Dinner? Seriously? Who delivers or where’s the closest protein bar? 4. Happiness comes from\u2026<\/em><\/p>\n<\/p>\n a. Achievements and how they translate financially! 5. Your philosophy is closest to:<\/em><\/p>\n<\/p>\n a. Whoever dies with the most toys wins 6. When it comes to what people think of you, your primary concern is:<\/em><\/p>\n<\/p>\n a. Seeming professional and on top of your game 7. Which word best describes how you see yourself.<\/em><\/p>\n<\/p>\n a. Overworked 8. While no one wants to judge, I’ll admit, I’m most likely to judge people on their:<\/em><\/p>\n<\/p>\n a. Level of professional success SCORING Mostly B: You’re Living by the Rules of the Unloved<\/strong> Mostly C: You’re Living by the Rules of Society<\/strong> Mostly D: You’re Living by Your Own Rules<\/strong>
b. Maintaining my relationship or finding love (relationship)
c. Fitting in friends, family or co-workers (society)
d. Balance\u2026 however I define it (yourself)<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
b. My partner’s opinion – if single. whether or not I’ll meet someone
c. How cool I’ll sound when I say I’m going to [fill in the blank]
d. What my purpose for the trip is – to chill, be adventurous, sightsee…<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
b. That it goes over well at home\u2026 or it doesn’t make me fat!
c. Not letting down the three people I agreed to meet\u2026 even though they’d understand if I cancelled!
d. That it be easy. Healthy\u2026 and okay, on this particularly stressful day, maybe a little indulgent!<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
b. Love and family
c. Being known and liked
d. Finding fulfillment, achieving balance <\/p>\n<\/p>\n
b. Without love, I am nothing
c. You can tell a lot about someone by their friends
d. You can<\/em> have it all\u2026 it just depends what you’re willing to sacrifice.<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
b. Being perceived as loveable\u2026 and loving.
c. Measuring up to the standards set by my peers
d. Maintaining the respect of as many people as possible even if they’re not close friends<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
b. A people pleaser
c. A good example of how to live
d. Content… as in the moment as I can be<\/p>\n<\/p>\n
b. Marriage status
c. Social standing
d. Behavior toward others<\/p>\n
<\/strong>
Mostly A: You’re Living by the Rules of the Game<\/strong>
Clearly, you work really hard. Some might even say you’re a work-a-holic – though you’d probably just say your job is important to you. The catch is, no matter how much or how hard you’re powering away, you may or may not be getting where (you think) you’d like to go. In fact, whether you’re cashing in or slaving away in the hopes that your ship is en route, most of the time you probably feel like you’re caught in the mouse wheel of life\u2026 and it’s run by your boss. While working hard is commendable, it’s vital to set professional boundaries as well as goals. Believe it or not, taking time off for you, your family (if you have one\u2026 or even want one eventually) and your sanity is the only way you’re going to find balance. Does this mean no more late nights? No. But it can’t be every night\u2026 and it can’t preclude every other area of your existence from flourishing. <\/p>\n
You’re always concerned that your lover is happy. If you don’t have a lover, you feel desperate to find one. This informs every move you make from how you spend your Friday nights to what you wear to work. After all, you might just meet someone in the hallway! This is true. But if someone else’s happiness (or the idea that someone else can solidify yours) is the driving force in your life, you’re not living for love\u2026 you’re living like you’re unloved. And while you may only do this occasionally (selecting a few b’s shows that you care about love, which is great!) it’s important to remember that any good relationship is reciprocal, wherein both partners have a voice. Similarly, single life is only unhappy if you make the fact that you’re single the focus. The key to dictating your own destiny (with one of the goals being a happy, mutually satisfying relationship) is to put a little more focus on being personally fulfilled – knowing what you like, and spending some time doing it. If you’re part of a pair, you’ll find that you bring a fuller half to the whole, and if you’re single, you’ll find the mates you attract are much better reflection of the person you chose to become. <\/p>\n
While culture is hard to avoid and tabloid magazines greet us at every grocery check out, being part of the “in-crowd” is not everything. Still, to one degree or another, like a good chunk of modern society, you’ve bought into the idea that it’s what you have and who you surround yourself with that makes you who you are\u2026 at least a little bit. Don’t beat yourself up. It’s easy to do. But the truth is, by striving to keep up with the Jones’s and worrying mainly about how you’re viewed from the outside, you’re giving power to people who don’t deserve it. Liking things that are fashionable or trendy is not wrong\u2026 but liking things because they are fashionable and trendy and seeking to have them at whatever cost lest you be thought less of, is a slippery slope. Fitting in is not everything\u2026 and the best way to fit in where you belong, is to be yourself. Stop letting fashion\/pop-culture\/your friends\/society set your rules and make your own game plan! <\/p>\n
Congratulations! Whether you’re placing the most emphasis on work, home, friends, family, love or anything else, you seem to be giving enough attention to all the facets of your life. You understand that balance is the key to lasting happiness, and while it doesn’t prevent you from experiencing lows (or climbing to the highest highs), it makes a difference when you’re faced with difficulties in any arena. That’s because you’re rested, reassured and ready for whatever life hands to you\u2026 not burnt out from work, overburdened by unbalanced relationships or worried about what other’s think of your every move. You feel good enough to know you make your own life and play by your own rules\u2026 which is why you so often find yourself claiming the gold! <\/p>\n