Stop Apologizing! Here Are 5 Things You Should Never Be Sorry For

When it Comes to Apologizing, Do You Do it Excessively?

Do you feel like you’re always saying you’re sorry? You’re not alone. Constant apologizing is so common, it’s become an epidemic—particularly among women. But the truth is excessive apologizing only undermines your power (and the power of an authentic apology) and it’s got to stop! It’s easier than you think and we’ll show you how.

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Here are five things you don’t have to apologize for—no matter what:

Asking for What You Want or Need

How many times have you opened an everyday request with “I’m sorry to trouble you, but…”? Odds are good, it’s relatively often, especially at work. If you’re asking for something you want or need in order to do your job, you don’t owe anyone an apology. Constantly apologizing before you ask for something isn’t going to get you promoted or earn the respect of your co-workers. What you’re asking for is commonplace. If you’re just apologizing to be polite, know that there are other ways to be polite to your co-workers when asking them for something. Instead of saying you’re sorry, why not ask if it’s a good time to make a request. If they say yes, proceed with your question. If they say no, ask for a better time. No apology needed!

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Giving an Honest Opinion

When a friend, colleague or loved one asks you for your opinion, don’t apologize for giving it. They asked for the truth, so you should be truthful! Just be sure to be gentle and kind with your opinion. Kindness and a gentleness go a long when when giving constructive feedback. If you apologize before you give your opinion, it means that you feel like what you are saying or doing is wrong. Since opinions aren’t facts, that can’t be the case. And you’re entitled to your opinion, so give it without apologizing!

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Going After Your Heart’s Desire

You only live once and you’ve only got one person to please—you. If you’re constantly apologizing to others for not living the life they want, stop. You don’t owe it to anyone to silence the song that plays in your soul, so stop apologizing for who you are and who you feel you’re destined to be. If you don’t live the life you want, you owe yourself an apology.

Getting What You Want

What’s worse than apologizing for going after what you want? Try getting what you want and then apologizing for it afterwards! Success is not something to be embarrassed about, so don’t apologize for it as if you are ashamed of it. Success is something to be proud of, just don’t become boastful—that’s something to apologize for. If you’re not excited about your achievements, who will be?

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Doing the Right Thing for Yourself

Being true to yourself should be your number-one priority. Even when faced with a difficult situation, you should go with your gut instinct and think about what’s best for you. Whether it’s breaking up with someone, refusing a job offer or any number of situations that could cause you to disappoint someone, you have to do what feels right and do it without apologizing. You can be truly sorry for the hurt or stress your decision causes, but you should never be sorry for making the best decision for yourself.

8 thoughts on “Stop Apologizing! Here Are 5 Things You Should Never Be Sorry For

  1. Linda

    Thank u so much for your advice on apologizing. I am the queen of it. I hate it when I do it!! U have empowered me to stop saying I’m sorry. Thank you again

    I wish I could afford to talk to one of you. We were in a serious car accident that left us disabled. My husband broke his back. I was told on 4 occasions he was going to die. I refused to believe it, so I fought with him. So happy he’s still here. I love him so very much..

    Reply
  2. Gina Rose ext.9500

    Great article, S.K Smith !!!!

    When you apologize for things that do not require an apology , you give your power away to others who may tend to see you as a doormat, weak, or indecisive.

    Reply
  3. manav

    thanks sir. . .i was feeling sorry . . B’coz i broke up my relationship with my girl friend. . . But today after reading above i realise i did it because i want to feel happy . . Live happy. , . . I leave her because i was not happy i that relationship. . .i did it for myself. . .

    Reply
  4. Patricia Phillips

    I was accused recently of not being helpful by my son. His 11 year old daughter is defiant and refuses to obey. I got the brunt of it. I feel awful. With the added addition of having a life threatening illness, I wonder what I should do or say to my son who is 44.

    Reply
  5. Humphrey Chai Jr

    I like this cause I’m always apologizing to bring peace,thank you for a reality check !!!! Mahalo!!

    Reply

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