Put Yourself First

 It’s Not Always Selfish to Focus on Your Needs

The idea of putting yourself first seems as bad as shoving a mother and her kids off the Titanic in order to make more room for you and your ego. That’s the wrong way to put yourself first. I know a better way and it could improve the quality of your life, career and friendships and I guarantee that there is nothing selfish about it.

Do you ever catch yourself saying the following statements:

1. I don’t have time for this.

2. I don’t want to disappoint anybody.

3. I should have said no.

4. I can get by with just a few hours of sleep.

5. I’ll just skip lunch.

How do you feel when these thoughts cross your mind? Do they stress you out, make you angry, irritated or grumpy? Do they make you feel like you have little control over your time? These feelings are a result of living your life for the benefit of other people, rather than for yourself. You aren’t taking your health, well-being and needs into consideration.

Your needs matter. Psychic Spencer ext. 5643 can teach you how to put yourself first

Sure, helping others can make you feel happier, healthier and less stressed, but there is a limit. If you’re not taking the time to nurture yourself, your good intentions drown in your own fatigue. Here’s how to put yourself first when your relationships, family, friends and career are all at the center of your universe.

You can:

Decide You Deserve it

You deserve to put yourself first, but not at the expense of others. If your partner needs you to pick them up from work and you’re 30 minutes late because you wanted to catch the end of your favorite TV show, that’s being selfish. If you opt out of getting drinks with friends because you really need to catch up on some sleep, that’s taking care of yourself.

Set Personal Goals and Keep Them

Helping others reach their goals is fulfilling, but what about your goals? Finding your purpose in life or finding your destiny are important and shouldn’t be ignored or postponed for the sake of helping others find theirs. Don’t sabotage yourself.

Make a Habit of it

One of the best ways to make time for yourself is to make a habit of it. Schedule it in and people who know you will come to recognize your schedule and work around it.

Psychic Maryanne ext. 9146 can show you how to form good habits.

Don’t Focus on Outside Approval

Many of us have the need to be liked and accepted, and we are willing to sacrifice our well-being to get it. If those people you are trying so hard to please really had your best interest and well-being in mind, they would want you to do the things that bring you joy. Do what’s best for you and don’t expect others to approve.

Ask for Help

People ask you for favors all the time, so ask a few of your own in return. Look for ways to streamline your daily tasks so you can get them accomplished quicker, and hopefully leave at least 30 minutes to do something for yourself.

“Only strong people ask for help.” – Psychic Kallista ext. 9623

One of the easiest ways to make people around you happy is to find happiness within yourself. Seek the moments when you can put yourself first, and you will discover better and more effective ways to serve others who are in need.

20 thoughts on “Put Yourself First

  1. Lakeshia

    I was in a ten year relationship it began when I was 19 had a child already he was 1 the man was 20 years older it was very long years very abusive more verbal then physical I really but him first most of that relationship I really lost my shelf every thing went down hill had three more boys lost them now it’s is even more hard to put my shelf first.

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  2. Bella

    THIS 4 patty, HOW DOES THE SAYING GO ” IT DON’T MATTER HOW YOU GET 2 heaven AS LONG AS YOU GET THERE ” FYI THIS MEANS YOU CAN PRAY 2 anyone being with OWN BELIEFS AS THEY so choose 2 WORSHIP .. When it comes 2 HEALTH RELATED PRAYER 1 shall not cast NO stone until 1 has walked a mile in 1’s own shoes .. FYI I WORSHIP AND PRAY AT 3 different churches so I’m sure my prayers are being HEARD LOUD AND CLEAR

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  3. m

    asking for help…is a really interesting test of others!!!…I tried it just last night and I was convinced that not many people deserve my sacrifice and I should reconsider my attitudes towards them.

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  4. Deborah

    I have a very magnetic aura, since I have a Scorpio Ascendent, even though my Sun is Sag, Moon Virgo, Mars in Cap in the 3rd, Jupiter in Pisces in the 4th, Uranus Cancer 9th, Saturn Libra 11th, Pluto conjunct MC in Leo, Moon 11th Virgo…Sun, Merc and Venus all Sag all 2nd. Neptune Libra in 12th.

    My problem is I am a loner type and yet so many people are rudely intrisive to me, even after I have sais I do not wish to talk with them (I choose who I wish to talk to and with) so I am daily and constantly innundated heavily
    with people who will not stop bothering me. I most often get up and depart, say nothing, but that is not always an option.

    Any suggestions?

    Example: I am quietly reading a book, when interrupted. One friend said just say nothing and make no eye contact. I have tried that, too, and yet even that does not always work. Arrgh!

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  5. Mary S

    It”s very hard for me to put myself first,because,I am employed with elder peoples. It has been very difficult for me to put myself first,because,there’s my only sister that’s can’t drive,so,i always makes sure that she has transportation to where she need to go.
    My SoulMate always getting on my case about taking out personal time for myself,because,He loves and cares about me.

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  6. Patty

    Look at what they tell you when taking off on a commercial flight, If the oxygen mask drops down, put YOURS on first before helping someone else. For those who said they have major health problems, maybe try praying to St. Jude.

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  7. Bella

    This is 4 shelia, I am 1 2 time cancer survivor, breast throat, ohhhhhh I get the radiology chemo thing from 1 survivor 2 another 1, they BOTH SUCK .. AND AS YOU KNOW THEY OR THE TREAMENTS DO TAKE UP ALL OF OUR TIME .. FYI MY KIDNEY DR just found a renial tare in my artery vein that supplies blood 2 my kidneys due 2 the radiology chemo stress on 1’s OWN BODY yes I’m LIVID AND I’M PISSED OFF TOO JUST BEING HONEST ABOUT IT !!! FYI THIS ARTICLE was tailor made 4 US 2 read .. FYI YOU DON’T NEED HIM, & he don’t deserve you 4 darn sure .. I don’t know where your faith stands out, but I’m willing 2 bet with your FAITH WITH bone cancer situation your faith IS REALLY STRONG RIGHT NOW WITH THAT BEING SAID MAYBE YOU SHOULD TAKE A LEAP of faith leave hin where he IS AT 4 now , AND IF YOU HAVE ANY doubts about him right now, WHEN IN DOUBT YOU MUST STOP THIS UNTIL YOU FIGURE IT OUT,HOWEVER 4 RIGHT NOW YOU MUST BE # 1, end of story .. fyi I work in the legal work field I often A PERSON DOES MAKE CHANGES BUT sometimes it just a little bit 2 late .. so PLEASE MAKE SURE RIGHT NOW YOU DO PUT YOUR SELF 1st, BECAUSE IN TIMES OF CRISES THIS IS THE TIME WE DO LEARN THE MOST ABOUT our selfs AS WELL ABOUT the folks who say they DO LOVE US BACK,…… but 4 right now , YOU DON’T HAVE THE TIME 2 worry about this man, our womens intuition IS VERY STRONG BUT 4 right now your weak from your treatments AND YOU NEED AND YOU MUST BE STRONG ONLY 4 your OWN SELF RIGHT NOW, yes folks do change after a BIG HOUSE JAIL EXPERIENCEbut @ who’s and WHAT COST , WHICH LEADS 2 ARE THEY REALLY READY 2 make their change 50% change 4 the better 50% Don’t change at ALL YOU SEE ,BUT…. RIGHT NOW you must come 1st .. ALL MY THOUGHTS { PRAYERS ARE WITH YOU, from 1 survivor 2 another 1, you don’t need this mess BS my friend, SO PLEASE WORRY ABOUT YOUR OWN SELF 1st, BECAUSE UNTIL 1 has walked a mile IN OUR SHOES HOW DARE THEY SIT IN JUDGEMENT OR CAST NO STONE UPON US UNTIL THEY DO WALK A MILE IN OUR SHOES, ALL MY PRAYERS SUPPORT IS GOING OUT 2 you, ((((( )))))) hugs and hers more hugs (((( )))) bella FROM a fellow cancer survivor myself MY PRAYERS & THOUGHTS ARE WITH YOU, please hang tight think ABOUT WHAT’S BEST 4 you IF ITS NOT THEN YOU MUST CUT everything else loose 4 RIGHT NOW YOUR IN A FIGHT 4 your life , my warmest blessings are with you and with ALL yours as well bella… 🙂 🙂

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  8. nancy

    What about someone who puts themselves ad what they want or enjoy first all the time??? I have a hard time with that and think it sometimes borders on selfishness!

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  9. Elaine

    Thanks..my family is ignoring me..but I have to think of myself first..I have a loving husband who needs me to be sane.

    Reply
  10. lacrystal

    I have a boyfriend whom i love i know everyone in his family his mom is a christian and tells me a lot of things. But he only calls me 2 times out of the month we text all the time and we barely see eachother. He has 2 ipods and is always on his brother phone. I go to school for medical assisting just got out of highschool and i work partime at safeway. I try to give him space so he can show his feelings more. When he invites me over he mainly ignores me for hours of me being there. But when i get a attitude he says im acting “bitchy” i dont get it how do i get this person to love appriciate and respect me like i respect him.

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  11. debra bryant

    put self first kids are grown grand kids are some what grown 21 16 15 years old i guess i allways have put my self first did not realize it i .allways travel go to spa get make over far as out side approval i thought my step children approval they grown now so i realize if my husband have solid relationship we are one so i put me first with no appoligze i hike cancer walk5k sky diving pairsailing i am56 and i am enjoying me my .time

    Reply
  12. Carle

    this was definitely a great blog !
    if you don’t learn to put yourself first you will never know how to put others first . may the Lord God help me everyday to see this point ever clearEr . in Jesus name amen

    Reply
  13. sheila

    i have a man whom clean his self up after 12 years of loving him and making sure he is and always set…he was in and out of jail…So now that he is clean from drugs and running the streets i find him clean he cheating on me. I have bone cancer and doing chemo regularly.

    Reply
  14. Judith

    So very true. Smetimes is a little hard to put myself first. I have improved thought. Today I just slept and I feel so much better. I know I have o catch up on my sleep. But is a little hard When I have some health problems.Thank you for your advise. God bless… jmjfl

    Reply
  15. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    Hi Eric,

    Hope you are enjoying the summer…….great article, very empowering !!!!

    Blessed Be )O(
    Gina Rose ext.9500

    Reply
  16. Angela

    This article was so needed to have read. Yes, I do agree that you should put yourself first at all times. Because if you don’t you will crash sooner or later. I try to keep focus on that myself.

    Reply

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