Are You Ready to Explore a Different Kind of Love?
Chances are, you haven’t heard either of these words. You may even be shocked when you learn their meanings. But for some people, the power behind these words is life changing. It can literally open a world of pleasure and happiness that others only wish they could have.
This brief article is not meant to change your beliefs or attitudes. It is only meant to give information so you can either investigate more or at least not be shocked by what others do.
There was a TV commercial a few years ago where parents got a tremendous amount of joy and pleasure seeing their young child looking at an amazing theme park for the first time. That’s the basic concept behind compersion. It’s a new word that’s not in many dictionaries. It means empathically feeling happiness, joy, and pleasure when you see that someone you love is experiencing happiness, joy, and pleasure.
If we kick this up a notch, you may feel happiness, joy, and pleasure when your husband, wife, or lover is doing something they really love, even if you don’t like it. For example, some women aren’t big fans of football, but they get a real kick and enjoy it when their boyfriends or husbands enjoy the “big game.”
Now, let’s take this up one notch further. If you can get enjoyment when your partner enjoys the big game, or a trip to a museum, what about a passionate kiss from someone else? I’m not talking about being a voyeur, but if your partner gets happiness, joy, and pleasure from kissing someone else, can you empathically feel those same emotions? Or to make it a bit more challenging, can you feel happiness, joy and pleasure when your partner is experiencing those emotions by having sex with another person? That’s true compersion.
Yes, that goes against everything we’re taught. The handsome prince is supposed to take away the beautiful princess and they are supposed to ignore everyone else forever. “I’m yours. You’re mine.”
But wait a minute. That’s not love. That’s ownership. Ownership of this kind can lead to violence. “How dare you take away what I own!” or “If I can’t have you, no one can!”
If I truly love you, shouldn’t I want to see you having all the happiness, joy, and pleasure you can possibly have? Shouldn’t I feel wonderful knowing you are experiencing all of these wonderful things?
Yes, you have to be sure of your relationship and the love of your partner for this to work, but for those who can break through old archetypes of what’s expected, of jealousy, and of the myths of childhood, it can result in more pleasure and bliss and joy. It can also lead to something else…
You love your parents and grandparents. You may have stepparents whom you love too, along with aunts, uncles, cousins, and of course, several children. In fact, you’re expected to love all of them.
But you can only love one spouse. He or she is supposed to supply all the romantic and sexual love you will ever need, always be understanding, always be in the mood, and always be there for you.
The reality is that this simply doesn’t exist. Nobody can be everything for you all the time. The false dream of this has resulted in the fact that half of all marriages end in divorce. The marriages that last come to terms with the reality rather than living in the fantasy.
Some people choose something different. Polyamory means “many loves.” It’s not about “swinging” or cheating or “open” marriages. People in polyamorous relationships may have two, three, or more wives and husbands. This is not polygamy or forcing people into unwanted relationships. Some “poly” families live together, some do not. Some have sex with others in the family, others do not. Polyamory is about bringing more love and more people into your life. For those who can transcend the ownership concept of relationships and move to ever-expanding love, polyamory gives them that experience.
One of the key features of polyamory is deep honesty. You have to tell your partners when you are happy or unhappy, worried, concerned, jealous, or angry. Together, you can work it out. Frankly, not everyone can be this open and honest. But when you’re not hiding anger and resentment, jealousy or disappointment, you are free to flood your life with joy, happiness, and bliss.
Unfortunately, some people use “polyamory” as a term to cover their cheating ways. Real polyamory, however, is based on trust, honesty, dignity, respect, and non-possessiveness.
Donald Michael Kraig graduated from UCLA with a degree in philosophy, and has become a certified hypnotherapist and Master NLP practitioner. His book, Modern Magick, is the most popular step-by-step course in real magick ever published.