How to Overcome Ruts in Marriage

Dealing With the Bonds of Marriage With Grace

Since the beginning of time, marriage has been considered a beautiful union of two souls. In the beginning, everything is bliss and nothing seems to go wrong. This is why we call it the honeymoon period. You’re both looking towards a bright future together, believing that there will not be marriage problems or loneliness. You can share finances, work as a team and even build a family. After a time, a couple may encounter ordeals, ruts, problems and hardships in their marital life.

There are ways to overcome obstacles and hurdles in a marriage and become even stronger if you take the time to listen to each other. When you first took your vows, you promised that through thick and thin that you will always be there for one another. When times get tough, it’s time to become even stronger as a couple and work your way towards getting yourselves back on track. Here are a few ways to overcome ruts in a marriage and to find your way back to where you began.

Active Listening

When one of you has a problem, do you focus and sit down to actively listen? Do you pay attention to what your partner is saying? Do you make eye contact? Sometimes couples fall into this funk, or shall we say “rut.” After a period of time in the union of marriage, a couple may start to take advantage of each other’s feelings and concerns. Remember that both individuals in the partnership have needs and sometimes feelings need to be validated by being acknowledged. Take time to listen to what your partner is saying. It doesn’t matter how trivial you may think it is because it is important that your partner talks it out and feels listened to.

Step Outside of the Box

Try mixing up your routine. If you have fallen into countless rituals and routines within the week, mix it up a bit. Is sex and intimacy scheduled on certain days of the week? Do you always meet at the same place for coffee during work hours? Do you sit in front of the television every night after work? It is important to keep things exciting and spontaneous in a marriage. Of course there are specific routines to adhere to, but when it comes to time together, add a little adventure into your lives. Step out of your marriage box; laugh, play and have fun together.

Express Yourself

Don’t underestimate the action of expressing your feelings to one another. If you say “I love you” every day when you both head off to work it can become routine and robotically said. Take time every now and then to share how much you appreciate each other. Be honest and speak from your heart. Lack of communication is one of the main reasons why marriages fail. The more you communicate how you feel even when you are angry or upset with your partner, the more you will be stronger as a couple in the long run.

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5 thoughts on “How to Overcome Ruts in Marriage

  1. Rose O.

    Yes, that is so true. I have reid countless articles etc. and they all
    say the samething. That communication is so important in a relationship. I have experianced and have seen the rut couples get
    into. So, I definitly agree with the all of the above.

  2. Okoye stella

    Really, communication is d bedrock 2 any sound relationship be it mere close friendship 2 marriage becos thru communicatin partners express themselves freely witout fear or favour.


    it’s true that communication is so much important in a relationship, it needs time , effort to share w/ both partner, all the moments, i’ts either sad or happy moments…thank you so much for all the thoughts that you’s actually made me believe that there’s nothing more to say..just show ur feelings from hearts and things good will follow..

  4. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    the stepping outside of the box and being creative is important…..and doesn’t need to cost alot of $$$$ to do.

    made me wonder, how many couples, had a bit of fun while ” camping out ” in their home during hurricane Irene……will probable read about many babies being born 9 months from now on east coast.

  5. Jacqueline

    Hi Natasha,
    Wonderful suggestions all are so true, I would also love to add its important to spend some real quality time with each other, stay connected too often we change so often in our life its important to change together.

    Blessings and Big Hugs!
    Jacqueline x9472


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