Are They Flirting With You or Just Being Friendly?

The Difference Between Flirting and Friendliness

When I was immersed in the dating world, one of my biggest challenges was figuring out whether a person was flirting with me or just being friendly. I knew that asking someone out on a date set me up for potential rejection, so I did what I could to make sure that my romantic advances would be embraced, rather than denied.

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And to add another layer to the challenge, not all flirting can be taken seriously. Sometimes people engage in harmless flirting, just to make themselves feel better. They may also flirt to get what they want—whether it’s an extra cut of meat at the deli, free dry cleaning or closing a business deal in their favor. So how do you know for sure when someone is flirting with you because they’re attracted to you? How can you tell if they’re flirting just to get their way? Is flirting their way of being friendly?

Smiling and Eye Contact 

You don’t have a lot to lose by being friendly. Your pride isn’t really at stake. But when it comes to flirting, there’s plenty more at risk. That’s probably why many people are so subtle in their flirting. And it’s also why you think your flirting is more obvious than it actually is. Friendliness and flirting both involve smiling and eye contact, and that’s what trips people up. If we’re not sure we’re being flirted with, it’s our default mode to assume someone is just being friendly. So if you are romantically interested in someone, your best bet is to be more forward with your intentions and leave no doubt in their mind that you want to be more than friends. Consider doing more than extra smiling and eye contact.

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Body Talk

If someone is flirting with you, they are going to draw attention to their assets. Women may try to impress potential soulmates by emphasizing their physical traits (body, eyes, hair and lips) while men may prefer to accentuate their successes (big house, expensive car and nice clothes). But when it comes to infatuation, both women and men are willing to show their submissive side, which is often evident in their body language. In other words, pay attention to how they act around you. Are they doing things to impress you? Are they showing you their submissive side? If they are, there’s a good chance they’re flirting with you.

Flirting With Everyone

As I said before, people flirt all the time without any intention of it turning into something serious. They do it because they crave attention and they enjoy the attention they get. It’s not so much about the people they’re flirting with as it is about how it makes them feel. So, what you should be watching for is the way they flirt. If they’re flirting with you and then they flirt with someone else, using the same technique, there’s a good chance they aren’t interested in a romantic relationship with you. but if they’re treating you different and they’re focusing all their attention on you, there’s a good chance they’d like to take things to the next level. Even people who flirt with everyone will take the extra time to make sure the person they’re attracted to feels special.

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James Bond

If you’re familiar with James Bond, you know that when he saw someone he was attracted to, he let them know. He never missed an opportunity to smile and flirt with the hope that it would turn into something more. He was confident and clear in his intentions. Be like James Bond and go after what you want!

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If you’re interested in someone, what’s the worst that can happen? Rejection? That’s fine. What if they think you’re just being friendly? That’s okay. There are plenty of other people to flirt with and if you do it right, someone will be receptive to it.

13 thoughts on “Are They Flirting With You or Just Being Friendly?

  1. Tom Robinson

    I flirt a lot I guess because it makes women smile and maybe brighten their day for a few minutes.Hell,if the joke or comment is right it might make a conversation with them.I am looking for a relationship and you never know who she might be.I am keeping an open mind and being patient,I am even tempered and well-mannered.Wouldn’t be called wealthy but I will never do without ever again,so I wouldn’t need her finances.I guess what I am trying to say is that dating is rather difficult in this day and age because of the economy.Most of the women I meet have these hidden agendas ,this is only me that I am referring to.I do not have enough space to tell a couple of tales of my trips searching for my soulmate.[YIKES] I know this women is out there,ex-wife Andrea once,Peggy Ayers is still out there somewhere,[I MISS YOU] I am looking for a athletic women that I can trust will be there if I should need her.In turn,I will always be there for her.Under Any Circumstances! PROMISE

  2. betty

    TO JANET T> The guy is not interested in a relationship and not even interested in you, for if he was he would reciprocate and you wouldnt be having a hard time. Let him go and find someone more better than him . He doesnt deserve you. Dont waste your precious time andk office romances are are to pull off in the workplace. Just do your work cause youre getting paid for it. Stop pursueing him. Guys hate to be pursued as youre going against nature. Stop showing him attention and lets see if he misses you. Flirt with other men outside the office. Now what do you really like in this guy? HEs ajerk

  3. Janet Thomson

    Not sure how to go about this I care about a man I work with , I told him by e-mail that i liked him as i did not want to embarass him as there always people around when we are on the same shift and he told me at the time that he was not looking for a girlfirend, but recently since I have lost weigh we alwais seem to disagree about things, but problem I am in love with him and its break my heardt as i want to walk up to him and put my arms around him, but i am sure he would push me away and also he has not answered my e-mails since i told him, i have also noticed when he speaks to me he looks away whats that about my manager says we are like a couple I wish I would like some advice .

  4. Karen

    It’s not easy to tell..but in my own experience, if you sense that they’re interested, they probably are. I don’t mean* thinking* so just because he or she is friendly, even flirty. Unfortunately, I’ve. known many men who assume a woman/ girl is interested because she’s nice and takes an interest. Some feel used or toyed with to find out she meant kindness not sexual attraction. But rarely is a girl just toying with him- women are taught to be caring and to look out for other’s needs.

    Of course,if a guy has a much higher position, or is very wealthy,he does have to take women’s supposed interest with a grain of salt- and the same is true if a woman is well- off financially.

    However, when someone flirts, or looks at you a lot when you’re not looking straight at them- *even if he or she flirts with mostly everyone* you can at least assume they find you sexually attractive. Or, if they flirt but* not* with you..they may be going overboard to avoid your noticing- or everyone else noticing! This is especially true if it’s on the job, and or if the person is engaged or married,or is your boss.

    My main point is*never* assume. If. *you* are interested, show a little more interest, and so forth.
    I say. “don’t assume* because you not only won’t be hurt that way,but also, even if they’re interested in you,he or she may not want to rush into something immediately.
    I’ve known men that aren’t interested in cheap affairs, and many women, attracted or not, will
    be more cautious as she’s quick to feel ashamed if she acted on impulse.
    Again,guys- this is not a game. While some women will take the initiative and try to seduce you- most of us are raised that we should not- or, we should not be quick to agree to sex. Therefore, it’s not a game she’s playing,but her deeply ingrained belief that if she has sex with you, you’ll then toss her aside and tell all your friends that you “got”her.

    Men, now- their version of that is fear of being laughed at-either because she’s not at all interested,or(especially) after sex- he fears not measuring up (literally and figuratively) to other men.

    My opinion? Even when we’re not truly. attracted (or aren’t any more), whether we’re seeing a man or a woman-there’s no excuse for bad behavior.

    We’re never obligated to like someone- ever. But cruelty and playing with someone’s feelings has no place in love and. sexual

  5. Natalia

    Yes Flirting can be taken the wrong way by some people but harmless flirting at a party or pub is exciting and makes the night a whole lot better.




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