9 Things Never to Say to a Woman

Hold Your Tongue!

While every situation and person is unique, there are some guidelines it’s best to adhere to when speaking with a woman. First of all let’s never make assumptions, tell them how to behave or discuss their sexual past. Let’s look at a few phrases you would do well to steer clear of if you want any chance of seeing her again.

1. “You look fine”

If she’s asking, she’s looking for affirmation, not an “I don’t care.” Think of something positive to say to her—even a generic “it looks great” comment will serve you better than this incendiary phrase.

2. “Relax”

Commanding her to suppress her emotions devalues her right to feel them and is, in essence, telling her those feelings are inappropriate. Unless this comment is delivered in a caring, sweet tone, the effect it produces is demeaning, not supportive.

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3. “When’s the baby due?”

Unless you know for sure that she is pregnant, this question has a huge potential to backfire on you. The odds of her being overweight or battling baby weight after she has had the baby are just too high for you to risk this question without hurting her feelings, and creating an awkward situation.

4. “Is it that time of the month for you?”

If she is upset enough to tempt you to ask this, doing so will probably send her through the roof. This question completely disregards her feelings by suggesting her hormones are to blame, when it could be a myriad of other reasons—not the least of which could be that you are equally to blame for the situation.

“Partnership and friendship are the keys used to unlock the door to intimacy and love.” – Giovanna ext. 5214

5. “How many people have you slept with?”

As curious as you may be about this answer, it’s just plain rude to ask it. Unless she wants to give you this information, it’s really none of your business.

6. “Smile”

While some men may think they are coming across as flirtatious, this command can be read as, “I don’t care how you feel right now, I want you to smile because it makes me feel better.” This directive can often be a selfish request by which the guy is asking her to flirt with him and make him feel validated as a male. If she’d felt like smiling at you, she would have, Romeo.

7. “Your friend is hot”

Unless the two of you have an open relationship where you constantly rave about others of the opposite sex, this remark can easily hurt her, especially if it is a friend of hers. With this one comment, you’ve just managed to let her know you’ve been checking her friend out instead of paying attention to her. You can bet, too, that you won’t be asked to hang out with the two of them again. What woman needs a guy around who’s checking out and commenting on her friends, causing potential strife in the friendship?

8. “How old are you?”

It really is amazing how many men will ask this question of a woman, even though it’s got to be one of the oldest rules in the book. As people tend to judge based on age, it’s her prerogative to tell whomever she pleases. If you haven’t known her for long, it’s just not appropriate to ask her this, and definitely not any of your business.

9. “Are you a lesbian?”

If she’s not responding to your suave pick-up lines the way you’d like, coming out with this question will ensure you’ll never get anywhere with her, and shows not only your lack of confidence, but a mean streak as well.

So let’s remember, when you’re trying to get somewhere with a lady you’ve got to be careful what you’re saying. Think before you speak. Don’t make assumptions. Be better about how you behave before you tell her how to behave. And never ask her about her sexual past. Following these guidelines will be helpful to your game with the ladies!

“Be kind and forgiving of yourself. We are all human, and we all make mistakes.” – Rivers ext. 5273

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38 thoughts on “9 Things Never to Say to a Woman

  1. Tracy

    Thanks for another great article, I love reading your posts and read them every day. I agree with kris, we are too emotional. I don’t get angry when people ask my age. I am 45 years young, I don’t look like it though. I have had people argue with me about it, they just don’t believe that I’m the age that I am. I have to take out my drivers license to prove it sometimes. I am emotional at times, but I just distance myself from others so I don’t bring them down. Everyone gets emotional at times,and that is alright, it is normal, but try to be considerate of others feelings, please. You never know what the problem is that they are having. Remember the Golden Rule “DO UNTO OTHERS AS YOU WOULD HAVE THEM DO UNTO YOU!

  2. Bismark

    Some of this question needs to be asked to get to know her more and even know the way she will react when angry.

  3. Polette22

    I agree with everything although we do tend to be very sensitive if i feel sad b/c i dont have any family in dallas, tx my sister leaves 7hrs. Away my husband once told me to stop crying b/c i was getting annoying it just made it ten times worst specially during the holidays! I am only 22yrs old first yr leaving away from family nothing new to him since he is older than me(hes 36)

  4. Marc from the UK

    The author missed out no: 10 That should of been are you wearing lipstick? Oh good can I taste it !!!!!! Gets me into trouble every time! In a fun kind of way lol

  5. Pingback: 9 Things Never to Say to a Woman | Psychic Hotlines

  6. Max Flavors

    The “Smile” is more about showing a pleasant demeanor as opposed to ingratiating a man’s ego, a smile less woman is a faceless.

  7. Kristin

    Your artical should be “10 Things Never to Say to a Woman.”You should’ve included “Are you a Virgin?” If you want to insult/humiliate someone whether it be when you’re alone or around people,ask that question.Just because a woman isn’t throwing herself on you or isn’t receptive to you’re flirting/come-ons,doesn’t mean she’s a virgin.Men:if you want to be successful with a woman,shove your fist in your mouth and don’t say anything.Their could be many reasons for why she isn’t responding to you.Try getting to know your date/girlfriend first before jumping to conclusions.Did you ever stop to think that it might have nothing to do with you.Maybe she has some personal issues she’s trying to work through.

  8. Randy Johnson

    You have to be a fool not to ask a woman her age,most of you lie so much about your age,you don’t even know.it is not a woman’s perorgative to lie.its amazin how a woman can lie and make it seem ok,it you want to truely be treated equal,stop actin like wrong is right because it’s not.
    Ps I know a lot of men that got in trouble believing a lying woman about her age.if it bothers women so much when a man ask her age,stop lying about it.

  9. Josie Behnke

    I had to laugh at this…I’ve had all od these, in fact most guys guess me at almost 6 years younger then my age, and my boyfriend at allmost five years older then him…funny reverse it and thats our age. I’ve had two kids, and have had people ask me if I was due anytime soon…thank god no. I’vw had those that sy it must be that tof month, my normal come back…and you’re stupid enough to piss me off…yep, women get a sense of humar and learn that men are different and not meaning harm most of the time.

  10. John

    How about “What never say to a man.” Many New York women need a course in how to be polite to a man in different situations. An example would be don’t be a snob!

  11. Kris

    While I understand most of the “no-no’s” of this article, the overall “just” I seem to get is that women are just becoming way too darn sensitive anymore. As a woman myself, I think it’s ludicrous how over-reactive we’re getting to everything from periods to weight to age, etc. I couldn’t care less if a guy asks how old I am. In fact, I am proud to say my age, because I don’t even look it. Time and time again, men have jaw-dropped at my actual age, because I do take good care of myself.

    Typically, the only women who get snotty and defensive are women who don’t take care of themselves, in my opinion (not always the case, but mostly true). Women who are fat will get offended about ANY use of the word fat, no matter WHAT the context. Women who don’t look good for their age typically get offended if asked their age, because they got wrinkles or are unkempt. And so on.

    If you’re truly taking good care of yourself, then those things shouldn’t matter so much to you. And, if it still offends you what he is asking, then perhaps you ought to look into why you’re so sensitive to it. Yes, some guys can say things in a smarmy manner, which IS rude and with a bad motive, but some men are NOT saying it in that manner. Each case is individual and should be handled as such.

    If you really equate a guy to being a pig simply because he asks some of those things, then perhaps you’re prejudging no more than you think he is! Not all men are judging you; there are many men who simply ask just to ask out of curiosity. I’ve asked a lot of men their age and even number of sex partners–so what? The men don’t even care; they just answer, and some get a chuckle out of it (which tells me they’re laid back, which I love).

    Perhaps we can learn a lesson from men, and stop being so damn over-reactive to every little question asked of us, or analyzing every comment said to us. It is this very reason why some men do accuse women of the period thing; if we don’t want that accusation made, then don’t over-react to everything a guy says or asks.

  12. Kabbis Lorseh

    Many thanks to the team for the level of education given, but, can you also list some things never say to a man?

  13. Lucinda

    I have read 9 Things you never say to a woman and you talk about a woman’s weight after she has a baby but a woman’s weight when she first meets a guy, which is not hidden,is not on there so my question is what do you tell or rather how fast do you tell a man to get lost when every date he brings to attention your weight? I have heard him say, you don’t need a car you can drive mine and I can put you on the driver’s side, then the passenger side, then in the back, I will rotate the car”s tires and put a sticker on your backside, “wide load”. I don’t know which hurt more that he thought it funny or that I was embarrassed more by his obnoxious laugh or the fact that he didn’t realize this was offensive. Now this guy is 15 years older than I, not well educated, has a speech impairment and a loud laugh that can be heard through out the restaurant. I never said once to him anything about his faults, not once but every time I turn around, my weight is an issue. Weight is something that is well aware when you look at someone weight is not something you can hide so I am thinking DUMP HIM! Again Thank You for your article on 9 offensive things.

  14. Stephen S. Potter

    Wow! I have been guilty of at least seven of these things never to say to a woman but for me, it’s probably too late as I am 69 going on 70 and since October of 1983, I have been pretty-much locked solely in a union of mutual financial necessity with my ex-wife. We are both not-at-all in love as we have been divorced since mid-1983 and we have no future plans whatsoever of re-marrying in that we cannot see each other for all the sour apples on the face of this earth, all present ones and all future ones alike and the last time we ever had sex was sometime in March of 1987. And as if to complicate things even further, I have been hopelessly infatuated with a newsbabe with an eastern TV station about 2,700 miles from me for about 15 years straight. She knows this and there are definite indications that she, like my ex-wife also cannot see me for all the sour apples on the face of this earth, all present ones and all future ones alike. Thus, I am stuck forever in their “friend zones.” with no prospects whatsoever for me for any kind of love whatsoever and, due to my age, there probably never will be. I believe that all this is God’s Will that I be punished in this manner because I was sexually and morally loose in my younger days in violation of one of The Ten Commandments. Anyway, there you have it.

  15. -quinn ext.5484

    9. “Are you a lesbian?”

    “no but after meeting you im considering it!”

    good one… unless a lesbian is asking then it is a pick up line…

    fun article.

  16. Amanda

    Add…stop pestering her if she’s not having enough orgasms. It’s very hurtful and it will end up with even fewer orgasms.

  17. beth

    How’s this one – a man of 64 taking me out for supper (aged 70 – looking 60)
    He said to the waiter “I’ve brought my mother out with me tonite” he later told me that he was joking!

  18. beth

    How’s this one from a man of 64 taking me out (aged 70 – looking 60) He said to the waiter “I’ve brought my mother out with me tonite!


  19. Abdul Rehman

    i agree or disagree. i decided after read this “9 things never to say to a woman”. then i comments above paragraph.


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