5 Secrets Men Keep

By Colleen M. Quill

We all have secrets. There are secrets we should share, like “honey, we’re in financial ruin because all our stock was invested with Bernie Madoff,” and then there are the ones that we should just let lie. Here are five of the latter:

1. Earning money makes men feel valuable. In the recession, divorce rates have gone up. The money that was once an endless flow now has to be accounted for and watched carefully. People continue to cut back on luxury items – but remember, if your man loses his job, his ego will have suffered a greater blow than when a woman does. You should always know your financial health, but especially in this economy, you have to do your part and pay attention. Eating at home more often will not only save money, it will create more quality time with your family. Turn that negative into a positive.

2. Men like to fix things! There’s a difference between this and mindless chores like taking out the trash or folding laundry – men like tasks where they can use a bit of ingenuity and muscle, like putting up a shelf or fixing the sink, which takes more skill. If your man spends a lot of time in the basement or his “workshop,” you might want to discuss a bigger project he can supervise, like an addition to the house, or even building a pond in your backyard.

3. Men like to drive because they don’t think women are good drivers. They feel the need to be in control, and find it puts them in a vulnerable position when we drive instead of them. If you have to pick your husband up from somewhere, offer him the chance to get behind the wheel. He’ll feel empowered and won’t be freaking out internally when you are talking on the phone at the same time as driving.

4. When you give men space, they appreciate you more! Men need alone time and they need male bonding time, so let them go, and even encourage it. It will make the time you have together more valued.

5. Men do look at other women, no matter how happy they are, so hopefully your man is subtle in this area. This doesn’t mean that your man is going to cheat on you or act on it with more than a smile… but it’s male nature to look.

What secrets would you add to the list?

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12 thoughts on “5 Secrets Men Keep

  1. Pingback: 5 Secrets That Men Hide | E! Fashion Talk.com

  2. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    Dear LocalStranger…….

    Do you have an older, single brother who thinks like you ????????? ( only kidding )….

    …I enjoyed reading your response. It was honest and gave a good view of the male perspective.

    Blessed Be )O(
    Gina Rose ext.9500

    Reply
  3. localstranger

    Hello, I’ll tell you my thoughts as a male.
    I don’t like fixing things. I am not a mechanic so dont ask me if I can fix the car.
    I am not a carpenter so don’t ask me to remodel your kitchen.
    Get people that know what they are doing to do these things.
    I like mindless chores, folding cloths vacuuming.
    Driving, I’m enjoy being able to sit in the passenger side and look around and not have to
    worry about hitting someone. I wish my wife ofered to drive me around since she knows
    where she wants us to go.
    Yes I need my space.
    I am not looking at that other woman all the time, I really may be looking at the car or building behind her.
    Don’t get mad If I do look at another woman, worry If I’m checking out other men.

    Reply
  4. sarajane

    Are you all kidding or are you from the the middle of last century. Excuse me they like to drive because they don’t think women are good drivers? If you need to pick give them the opportunity to drive so they don’t feel vulnerable. FACT men have more accidents than women and are more likely to speed and drive recklessly. Does a womens feelings o vulnerability not matter then?

    Men like to earn money. Don’t we all. I will give them some leeway on this mind you if he can’t find a job he will just have to learn to live with the economic economy like women do. Without someone pandering to them.,

    Reply
  5. wordpress

    It’s not a secret about men – but the last one (it’s the male nature to look – it’s (for some women) to look too – sometimes to see if men are looking at them or sometimes it’s because there is a guy that is really nice looking or just plain really nice. The only problem is that I ran across a definition of a “slut” recently which doesn’t speak too well for the freedom of women and their choices: The definition of a slut is “the morals of a man” – guess are boys don’t always “just look”.

    Reply
  6. shinobishowdown

    So true, did a man write this? Especially the looking at other women thing. That does not stop the GF’s / wives from slapping the poor fella or giving him the evil eye for looking.

    Reply
  7. pitababy100

    i really do have to agree with all of the above! and also adding that men like to be babied when they are sick. lol i give my fiance a lot of freedom. much more not that we are far apart. and i really dont mind if he looks at girls. we do that all the time. when we are out in public. im bisexual, so thats one thing that brings us closer. He is really crazy about money now, he works overtime anytime he gets a chance. He tells me he wants to get ready to have a family and wants everything done right. He was married once, but has no children. And i spoil him a lot! he has never received a bday or any kind of gift before. i am a very romantic n creative person so im always thinking about surprising him. it always works! he has even cry tears of happiness! Aaaahhh i love him so much! and love making him happy! 🙂

    Reply
  8. lorilori

    Well…let’s see…
    Men need to feel APPRECIATED, in that when he comes home at the end of a long day working to be the provider they really need to see you recognize and appreciate his efforts.
    Men need to feel you RESPECT them for who they are and what they do.
    Men, whether they will admit this or not, all want to have a WOMAN WHO CAN COOK. They get great comfort from a good home cooked meal. Anything that includes gravy is a winner. A woman who has mastered the art of flawless gravy preparation is a keeper. And if she can make BISCUITS AND GRAVY, he will worship her!
    All men look at other women true, but his most prized accomplishment is when his OWN WOMAN is one he is proud to have on his arm. She needn’t be spectacularly drop dead gorgeous because that in itself brings more headache than most men can live with. But men are most happily mated when their woman is good looking; she stays in descent shape, is not overweight, has a pretty face and takes care of herself. The long known truth is that men are visual creatures, and they enjoy knowing they have a nice body they get to take to their bed. They will never tell an overweight wife this, but they wish they could. Better yet, wish she would just know this already!
    Men like to be taken care of in the simple ways: a lunch packed for him to take to work instead of having to hit the chuck wagon vender, a well kept home, a wife who is happy to see him walk through the door, being told they are loved, and the confidence that he won’t get turned down for sex on Saturday night.
    Gotta love ’em! They are simple yet complex beings. Thus I never tire of taking care of my own wonderful, handsome, hard working man who is the love of my life and thank god also my husband! 😉

    Reply
  9. ivyx5198

    Hmmm…
    – when they are sick they LOVE to be babied
    – they love flowers and chocolates too
    – they hate talking on the phone, so if he does he must REALLY like you

    That’s all I got. This was fun:)
    Namaste
    Ivy oxox

    Reply
  10. browneyesbrowneyes

    I like this article too and it is so true. The hard part is for us women to not freak out because our man is showing his appreciation for some other woman. But as long as he is subtle its ok. Its when he starts remarking or trying to start conversation with that woman that the problem starts, lol. We do have to set the boundaries now dont we?

    Reply
  11. velvetoversteel

    Great article! I’ve been around men a long time of course and have grown boys/men of my own. After all I’ve learned, I agree with all of these!!

    I’m so excited and ready to use this knowledge about men with my Mr. Right coming into my life very, very soon! 🙂

    Thanks, Colleen, for another wonderful and needed post!
    Blessings & Many Hugs,
    Coreen

    Reply
  12. Gina Rose ext.9500Gina Rose ext.9500

    Hi,

    By far, this is an excellent little article, in fact, I feel it is the best article I’ve read on men to date.

    The overwhelming majority of the male clients I’ve read for over the past 44 years would agree as well on ALL 5 of these points .

    Great article Colleen !!!!!!! I’m giving you a standing ovation right now!!!!!

    Blessed Be )O(
    Gina Rose ext.9500

    Reply

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