Enlightening Answers

Q & A with Carol Allen

by Carol Allen
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I should be on the six acres of land with a double wide home with the man of my dreams. Unfortunately, I left this dream because of him straying. I know in my heart that is where I am supposed to be, but the man will not call me. Am I to forgive him cheating and call to tell him I'm coming back?

Signed,
Oozing With Regret and Forgiveness

Dear Oozing,

So - let me get this straight... He cheated on you, and isn't begging your forgiveness and speedy return with flowers, poetry, and huge displays of agony to make amends for his unspeakably selfish, lying acts, and yet you're thinking of calling him? Oh, my dear...  I'm afraid you're suffering from what I call the "There's only three men in the world," syndrome. A cheater will live to cheat again - I've never seen it work out otherwise. If he cheated when you lived with him, then it means he:

a) wasn't really committed to you
b) has no impulse control
c) is a selfish cad

But I'm guessing he was caught with his fingers in the cookie jar, "because he could." If it was that easy before and was hurtful enough for you to leave, why wouldn't he do it again? Trust me - he would... It's a big world - find a man who wants the level of commitment and exclusivity that you do.
 

All the Best,
Carol

I met a wonderful man. We were only together for eight months. He had to return to Mexico due to family illness. He's been unable to return to the United States due to problems with obtaining a visa again. We've been in contact continuously over the past two-and-a-half years. We both express our love for one another and hope to be reunited. The happiness we shared is unbelievable during the time we had together. Is there hope in this situation?

Signed,
Sleeping Single With My Citizenship

Dear Sleeping,

Honey - Mexico is cheap, beautiful, and has some of the best food in the world and a man you've been missing like crazy for more than two years! GET YOUR BUTT TO MEXICO! I don't care if you have to hold a car wash in your frontyard - you need to go see the man. He can't do anything about his situation, and our borders are only getting tighter in this war-torn, paranoid time - but you have options. Go to him and find out if what you have is real. If it is, then make a life with him down there, or marry him so he can come back here. The world is full of women who would walk on their eyelids over broken glass to find a man and relationship such as you're describing. Toast your good fortune over margaritas for me!

Get Going,
Carol

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